My friend and I have been best friends since 5th grade. Now we're going into our freshman year and that also means homecoming. He is always kinda sad and he knows I'm always there if he needs someone to talk to. This year I want to ask him to homecoming, but I only want to ask as friends. My reason is that, I have a boyfriend, but we don't really want to go public yet. I already discussed this with him and he is fine with me asking my friend to the dance. My problem is, how exactly am I supposed to clarify that I am asking him to be my date to the dance, but only as friends?
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I would be honest. Tell him he is a dear friend and you'd love to go to the dance with him and your boyfriend is fine with it.
Everyone I told you me and my boyfriend are not going public. Mine and my boyfriends mutual friends know about the relationship but we don't want anyone else to know yet.
I would let him know how much you value his friendship and how over the years the friendship has grown. Also tell him about your boyfriend if he doesn't already know. Be honest with him and up front.
I would tell him that you want to go to the homecoming dance with him and why you want him to go with you. I am sure he will be happy to accompany you to the dance.
Since you are already good friends talking honestly about the event should not be a problem but maybe you should start with a reminder that you and he are good friends and, as a friend, you would like to see him happy and you think the two of you going to this event together would make both of you happy.
Tell him you guys should go as friends in a friendly-suggestion type of way. Don't make it seem romantic or lovey in the least! Also make sure you mention a couple times your boyfriend is cool with it.
Just be honest and explain it to him the way you did here.
You say all your mutual friends know about your boyfriend and you say the friend you want to ask is your best friend since 5th grade has not been told. So why aren't you ready to tell him about your boyfriend? You are very concerned in making sure he knows this is just a friendship date. Is it that your best friend has feelings for you and you know it? If so, he could get hurt if you tell him you have a boyfriend but you want him to go with you to an event as friends only.
Why can you not go public with your boyfriend? I suspect that your boyfriend is not a suitable companion for you and the adults in your life would not approve. Something is wrong here.
Bottomline, If you can't be honest with your friend, you need to find another date for homecoming.
My parents actually really like my boyfriend, and his parents like me. In fact his sister is even one of my best friends. The reason we don't want to go public is because his parents are divorced and we want to wait till the whole custody thing is established. He goes back and forth between his moms and dads houses and We do not want to put more stress on his family by telling them about the relationship.
That's very sweet that your boyfriend is allowing you to ask your best friend to homecoming.
Tell him, let's go to homecoming together as friends! Nothing further.
You're both friends since 5th grade so asking him to homecoming shouldn't spark anything. And he probably knows you have a crush on someone else like your boyfriend perhaps?
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