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I was cleaning the battery terminals on my fishing car (I don't fish for sport, thank you), when I dropped a socket down into that conglomeration of wires, hoses, belts, etc. It was completely out of reach. It almost went through to the ground. What's a body to do?
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Then I had a brainstorm. Well, to tell the truth, it's always quite a bit dark and cloudy in there. It doesn't lighten though. Actually, there's very little electrical activity going on. Seems my synapses have just about syned out.

Now, where was I? Oh, yes! My grand moment of improvisation. I went inside and got a leg from a pair of panty hose. Well, not an actual leg, just that part of the panty hose they call a leg. The only body parts I keep around are my own. Sometimes, I don't think they'll be around much longer.

Anyway, while I was securing that 'leg', I also rounded up one of those sticky things used for retrieving lock washers accidentally dropped down a manhole. No, it wasn't a wad of chewing gum on a long string. Hang on, I'll think of it in a minute.

Oh, yes! It was a magnet. You know, one of those things that's got connections to the poles, the North and South poles. Did you know the magnetic poles swap places ever so often. They sure do. (Well, not so often. Sometimes 500,000 years in between). And those brainy boys say we're just about ready for another 'flip flop'. That's what they call it, a flip flop. No wonder I don't know where I am half the time.

Back to my car? Oh, yes. I slipped that little magnet into that little leg and dangled it around down in there where my socket was. It took a bit of angling, you know, like when you're dealing with a wise old catfish.

But you know something? I angled and dangled that socket right outa there. Sure did. I sure did. And you know what else? Those panty hose make great strainers for water based paints. Sure do.

I hope when that flip flop comes, it won't make me sea sick like the way the rides at the county fair do.

When I was young, my aunt said my hair was so wavy it made her sea sick just to look at it.

Seems like those panty hose would be awful drafty. Are they, Betty? Good way of keeping things aired out, I guess.

I think one of my synapses is stuck in a loop.

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July 12, 20170 found this helpful

I don't know what's better, the tip in itself or the way you wrote this. I'm such a likekinds fan!

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July 13, 20170 found this helpful

You need to write a book and have it published.

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July 13, 20170 found this helpful

Thank you!

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July 14, 20170 found this helpful

What a hoot! You really know how to cheer us old folks up (me) - I will have to come back after changing my panty-hose.

They say a belly laugh is good for what ails you and I'm feeling better already.

Pantyhose - aired out? Too constrictive for my day - haven't you ever heard of Frederick's of Hollywood?

I guess there is a tip in here somewhere - maybe I'll find it later?

Betty

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July 14, 20170 found this helpful

Thanks, Betty.

The tip was to use a panty hose leg (due to its stretchability) to hold a magnet used for retrieving metal objects from hard to reach places. Sorry, I thought it was obvious.

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July 14, 20170 found this helpful

Just kidding - I think it is a really good tip and I feel sure I will find a way to put it to use in the future. Your tips are always useful and I always look forward to your presentation of "how to" as they are informative in an entertaining way.

thanks for all your tips.

Betty

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July 16, 20170 found this helpful

Lined dried sheets. You do know I slept like a baby that night.

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July 16, 20171 found this helpful

My Dad used to used them for straining paint. You can also stretch them over a picture frame for a paper making process, cut them into rings and loop them together to make knitting yarn, cut them up for cushion stuffing or pop one of those legs over your head any time you need some extra dosh ;)

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July 16, 20170 found this helpful

oh and also as kids we used to put a tennis ball in the toe, take hold of the other end, stand with our backs to a wall and fling it side to side to bang against the wall

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July 17, 20170 found this helpful

Lotta good tips there, Shirley.

I guess I never needed any extra dosh since I don't know what it is.

I'm gonna check it out though, I might be dosh deficient.

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Anonymous
July 16, 20170 found this helpful

You are hysterical...and clever! Please write a book, or a blog!

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