She will be starting school this fall and I don't know what they will do with her then. Thanks for any help you may give me.
It sounds like more of an emotional problem than physical. Perhaps the child is feeling stress over a new relationship her dad has? Perhaps she doesn't spend enough time with just her and dad and feels that any attention, even negative, is something she wants? Maybe there is a new situation in the household (new school, new daycare, new sibling, new... ?) that is causing unrealized stress.
As to how to deal with it, just remind, remind, remind her to listen to her body and how important it is. Stress that since she's a big girl, she needs to listen very hard to her body. But don't berate her when she does have accidents, just help her to quietly get cleaned up, changed, and back to normal. Making too much out of the accident will probably have the opposite of the desired effect.
When this happens to my daughters, I talk with her as I help her change into clean, dry clothes, about listening to her body and being a big girl and all the big girl things she can do. I try to reinforce that it's no big deal (even if I feel like it is a big deal), that she has mastered LOTS of big girl things, and that I know she will try to not have an accident next time. Believe it or not, this method DOES work.
I'm just a mom, not a Dr, and every child is different. But I have used this method on 3 different girls now and it's worked well. Good luck! (06/26/2005)
You said she's been checked by a doctor, has a urologist checked her? If not, there could be a problem the regular doctor doesn't see. My daughter wet the bed every night until she was 5 years old. I finally took her to a urologist and he found stenosis of the uretherer and that her bladder is smaller than average. He dilated it (in the operating room) and it gave instant relief from the problem. Best of luck. (06/27/2005)
Don't make a big deal out of it. Try and find special underwear (like Pampers pull up training pants), just tell her that they will help her know when she has to go potty. (06/27/2005)
My stepdaughter had this problem when she was your daughters age, her mother finally took her to the doctor and found that she had a very small bladder, the mother was told to make sure the little girl goes to the bathroom within an hour of drinking something, and also nothing to drink or eat 3 hours before bedtime. Hope this helps. (06/27/2005)
By RoseMary B
I am a teacher and sometimes this type of problem is due to stress. 5 year olds do experience stress! Depending on how long she has been doing this and any big changes in her life recently. Sometimes children do this subconsciously to get attention if they are feeling left out or out of control. Facing school for the first time could be upsetting her. These things could be adding up.
I suggest talking to her in a simple way about what may be upsetting her. Don't mention the wetting herself problem, I'm sure it upsets her too and will make her shut down and not talk to you. Maybe just spending some extra time with her might help. These are just thoughts and certainly may not pertain to your situation. It is just an idea.
Good luck! (06/28/2005)
See another doctor. I have a friend whose daughter has issues with wetting and soiling herself. They are physical problems. I would see doctors until one could offer help. Even if it is a behavior issue, a good pediatrician will be able to offer suggestions and support to help. (06/28/2005)
Years of working in childcare field and babysitting, I have seen wetting problems. Some are behavioral, others are from having too small of a bladder and this is more common than you think. The kids outgrow this and the parents are going to need patience. It is very wonderful of you to care so much for your boyfriend's child. Good luck.
My child wet the bed on and off until about age 6. I thought she would never outgrow it and/or was just too plain lazy to get up in the middle of her sleep, but luckily she outgrew her "Nocturnal Enuresis", thank God! Try taking away water privileges just before going to bed. If child has small bladder they may not hold much.
If you have checked the child and there is no physical and/or behavioral problem that may need other treatments:
How about trying those new GoodNites Underpants, to fit bigger kids from 38 to 125+ lbs.
Good Luck! (07/09/2005)
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