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I need some clean Christmas "gag" gift ideas.
Rags from TN
how about: grow your own furniture kit: acorn in a bag with note that says: plant and in 40 or so years cut down and make your own oak furniture. Belly button lint cleaner: a piece of pipe cleaner that is curved at end to look something like a toilet bowl brush.
We did this one year and it was hilarious. Everyone received a gift specially designed for them. For instance, one of the family was moving from California to Minnesota so we wrapped up a "can of smog." Another had an extreme political hatred of someone so we made a necklace of his picture on it for her to wear. You get the idea. It has to be personal yet something you can laugh about.
Redneck gift idea:
Buy the largest pair of panties you can find and safety-pin this message on the front:
A pair of "draws' for Mrs. Claus.
An addition to the Car (Ford, Dodge,etc.) Repair Kit. My brother was in school, so I added mom & dads phone numbers on a tag (stated..if all else fails) in the bag with the duct tape & rubber bands. He got a kick out of it.
My daughter and I did this totally off the wall gag one year and gave it to the person we thought would flip out the most. Go out about a week before Christmas and buy a food item from a fast food restaurant (we bought a hamburger from McDonalds). Wrap it up and put it under the tree.The reaction to that burger was hilarious. I will never forget it.
My family is just huge on gag gifts. Most of then just get passed along to everyone. The number one running gag gift in our family is this stupid glass head that me and my mom found at pier one. We just couldn't understand why anyone could ever possibly want one of those. So we bought it. It has showed up so many times at holidays!
I think the best one was at my sisters wedding, she really hates leopard print, so we tied a leopard print scarf on it and gave it to her. My mom has recently quit her job that she's had for over 20 years. So when she left she put the glass head up on a shelf with a note in it that says Laura was here.
I really wish they still made these glass head but we haven't been able to find them in a while. Another thing I did was last year for our family grab bag, I bought one of the new really ugly x-mas trees made out of bark. Once again who would ever want one of those.I didn't just stop there... I got a really ugly feathered bird with shiny beads on it, and made that the tree topper and then got a tree skirt... then i glued a bunch of glitter and little pom poms to it. It was hilarious. My sister in law ended up getting it, and I can't wait to see it put out this year for x-mas :)
For a secret santa gag gift at work I printed a glossy 8x10 of Mr. T and signed it "To ****, hugs and kisses, Mr. T xoxo". Put that in a cheap frame and you've got a very low cost gift. Also works great with Burt Reynolds, Patrick Duffy or Alf. :)
I don't know how "clean" the gag gifts need to be, but, if you go to www.kitchenmixgifts.com and click on gift ideas, then go to #8 for gag gifts they have some ideas and little poems that you can print out. For example, there is snowman poop, Grinch Toots, there is one that has a poem about making cookies, then eating them all, and you give an empty plate with a cookie cutter on it. I think the Grinch Toots was kind of cute, you bag up green M & M's and give the little poem that went along with it. I am interested to see what other people will suggest, I am not too clever coming up with gag gifts.
Here are some that I have saved for future use.
Hope this helps.
1. Put a short piece of rope in a small bag and label it "TOW ROPE FOR SHORT HAULS".
2. A tiny bottle of bath oil labelled "OIL CHANGE FOR A MINI-VAN".
HILLBILLY BUBBLE BATH Put some beans in a small jar and label it "Hillbilly Bubblebath" " cook and eat two hours before bathing".
HILLBILLY WASHER AND DRYER
These are a tiny clothes pin and a metal washer (you use them between a nut and a bolt when building things) in a small baggie with a tag reading Washer and Dryer or Hill Billy or Redneck...)
HILLBILLY WASHER AND DRYER NO. 2
Hillbilly washer and dryer: Standard washcloth and regular clothespin is what our Boy Scout group used for monthly training meeting gifts.
The Yard Stick is a stick (with personality of course...) I made up a tag which I attached. "This is a yard stick. I know this cause I found it in my yard.
GIFT NOT INCLUDED
I bought two AA batteries, put them in a box with a note saying "Gift not included"
The home exerciser is a block of wood with this saying printed on paper glued to it.
1. Place in middle of the floor
2. Walk around it two times
3. Rest, you've just walked around the block two times.
Put some straw in a zip-loc bag and attach a tag that reads "Straw Hat -- Assembly Required"
Sawdust in a small zip lock bag labeled "Expert Jigsaw Puzzle"
DIAMOND STICK PIN
Glue a dime on a stick ("dime-on" Stick) and add a pin back. A little card that says something to the effect that you have too expensive of taste for our frugal budget or explain the pun.
MAGIC WEIGHT LOSS BEANS
1 Remove beans from bag.
2 Throw them on the floor.
3 Bend down and pick up each bean.
4 Repeat hourly as needed.
SHORT ON DOUGH
Attach a bow to a roll of cookie dough with this note: "We thought this would come in handy since everyone's a little short on dough around Christmas time."
Bag confetti items, i.e., small airplanes, boats, cars, trucks, for those who just can't really afford the brand spankin new ones they can grow their own.
Musical notes confetti can be given to the person who just can't carry a tune, you can give them a bag of notes!
Tiny little Christmas presents that are meant for miniatures, these could be given for someone who is wishing for that very expensive present, they can grow their own.
DODGE, FORD, CHEVY MOTOR REPAIR KIT
Duct tape and a rubber band in a baggie.
Take a toilet bowl cleaner stick a snickers or and baby ruth in the middle of it. then attach a note to it that says "I think you forgot to flush"
Put a nut in a small box and wrap it. Write a note saying "your a nut".
or on your note you could put
"from one nut to another"
One year I got a section of the classifieds along with a pack of toilet seat covers. You could also add in one of those travel toilet paper rolls too.
Last year for Christmas I got a gift that had a pair of batteries and said "Toy not included" Everybody laughed.
A great funny gift for the holidays is Jingle Jugs. I just found a promo code that let's you get them for only 10 bucks @ jinglejugs.com. All you have to do is type in JJTEST in the coupon code box upon checkout.
This one stole the cake last year at my daughter's youth group Christmas Party. It is a POO-POO Platter. Design a platter with notations about the various forms of poop. Marshmallows(Snowman poop), Miniature Tootsie Rolls(Elf poof), Rasinettes(Reindeer poop) and a Baby Ruth candy bar(Santa poop). It is hilarious!
So this one is really cute, get a baby food jar (empty) and fill it with water, a lump of coal, and a baby carrot and put a tag on it that says "melted snowman". It's very cute! Also take a little jewelry box and put a note inside that says,"well, its the though that counts", and then wrap it in a bigger box,then wrap those in a bigger box, then wrap those in a bigger box and so on. It's really funny because whoever gets it has to keep going and as they do they are laughing and then when they get to the note finally, it's funny because even though they laugh, you can tell they are a little ticked off. This is so much fun for everyone to watch. haha
Hope this helps!
Best of luck!
I have a "short" friend and every year for Christmas and birthdays we give each other a "short" gag gift. However, I'm at a loss as what to give him this year. Can anyone give me ideas on a good gag gift I can give him that relates to being a short man? I gave him a catalog for his birthday for clothes for the short man.
Any ideas would be greatly appreciated!
How about some shortening, or short bread cookies?
How about home made shortbread cookies, or shortcake, or a package of Scottish shortbread?
Or a can of shortening? Like he needs to be shortened more. . .
I'm so funny.
Are you sure he thinks these gag gifts are as much fun as you do? I know a few short men who have great senses of humor, but after a while that joke wears thin, and truth be told, they are as sensitive about their height as anyone else is about their own "shortcomings." No one likes their inadequacies continually pointed out to them. Maybe it's time to step back and reconsider. He may be short in stature, but sounds like a very big person with a huge sense of self.
Thanks to everyone that responded. Lots of great ideas. As someone said in one of the posts, eventually this will wear thin. I will have to come up with just plain ol' gag gifts. Once again, I appreciate everyone taking the time to respond to my question.
A pair of children's knit gloves in a wild color in case he expects to be "handled with kid gloves" as many people do.
Providing he has a good sense of humour (which you both seem to have), how about giving him a pair of wrist sweat bands but tell him they're legwarmers? :)
How about a can of "shortening"?
A beautifully decorated home made strawberry shortcake U^u*U
How 'bout a pair of shorts? or even girls "short shorts"?
How about a mushroom shaped pillow he can hide under in case it rains?
How about a money tree. Get a nice branch, paint it red, I used red nail polish, then once dried, tied bills to the tree as leaves. Placed the branch in a pot and gave it as a beautiful gift.
I think making some "BBQ Short Ribs" would be appropriate!
assumming he likes the joke thing and wants you to continue it each year, what about pencils sharpened really short, you could even get them with his name on them.if you know his age get that number of pencils
My newlywed son is dreaming of receiving an "owners manual" for his wife. I think that would be a great "gag" gift. I'm having trouble putting it together. Any ideas from you creative people?
By pizza mama from Oakley, CA
This is such a good idea. Put some coupons for get out of an argument free. A couple of cards that say "I'm Sorry" and a big print page with their Anniversary Written on it with the nearest Florist address and telephone number. You might add a page where all her friends and wedding party put nice statements about what they like about him the most!
How creative of you to think of this. Love it! Robyn
My hubby has a plaque that says Rule#1 The Wife is Always Right Rule # 2 When in doubt, refer back to rule # 1.
You might try Amazon.com for a cheaper version.
Found that one on Amazon http://www.amaz mp;x=23&y=24
Check this out http://www.squi dding-tips-groom
That was all I could find, good luck and have a joyous wedding.
Whoa.. found two other books that might be more appropriate. You know the bride and groom I don't.
This is the word women use at the end of any argument when they feel they are right but can't stand to hear you argue any longer.
It means that you should shut up. (NEVER use "fine" to describe how she looks.
This will cause you to have one of those arguments.)
2. "Five minutes"
This is half an hour. It is equivalent to the five minutes that your football game is going to last before you take out the trash, so women feel that it's an even trade.
"Nothing" means something and you should be on your toes.
"Nothing" is usually used to describe the feeling a woman has of wanting to turn you inside out, upside down, and backwards. "Nothing" usually signifies an argument that will last "Five Minutes" and end with the word "Fine."
4. "Go Ahead" (with raised eyebrows) This is NOT permission; it's a dare! If you mistake it for permission, the result will be the woman will get upset over "Nothing" and you'll have a "five-minute" discussion that will end with the word "Fine."
5. "Go Ahead" (normal eyebrows)
This is NOT permission, either. It means "I give up" or "do what you want because I don't care." You will get a raised eyebrow "Go Ahead" in just a few minutes, followed by "Nothing" and "Fine" and she will talk to you in about "Five Minutes" when she cools off.
6. "Loud Sigh" This is not actually a word, but is still often a verbal statement.
Very frequently misunderstood by men. A "Loud Sigh" means she thinks you are a complete idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you over "Nothing!."
7. "Soft Sigh" Again, not a word, but a verbal statement. "Soft Sighs" are one of the few things that some men actually understand. It means she is momentarily content. Your best bet is to not move or breathe in the hope that the moment will last a bit longer.
8. "Oh" This word -- followed by any statement - is trouble. Example; "Oh, let me get that". Or, "Oh, I talked to him about what you were doing last night." If she says "Oh" before a statement, run, do not walk, to the nearest exit. She will tell you that she is "Fine" when she is done tossing your clothes out the window, but do not expect her to talk to you for at least two days.
("Oh" as the lead to a sentence usually signifies that you are caught in a lie). Do not try to lie more to get out of it, or you will get a raised eyebrow "Go ahead," sometimes followed by acts so unspeakable that I can't bring myself to write about them.
9."That's Okay" This is one of the most dangerous statements that a woman can say to a man. "That's Okay" means that she wants to think long and hard before deciding what the penalty will be for whatever you have done.
"That's Okay" is often used with the word "Fine" and in conjunction with a raised eyebrow "Go Ahead." Once she has had time to plan it out, you are in for some mighty big trouble.
10. "Please Do" This is not a statement, it is an offer. The woman is giving you the chance to come up with an excuse for what you have done. In other words, a chance to get yourself into even more trouble. If you handle this correctly, you shouldn't get a "That's Okay."
11. "Thanks" The woman is thanking you. Don't faint and don't look for hidden meaning. Just say "you're welcome."
12. "Thanks A Lot" "Thanks A Lot" is dramatically different from "Thanks." A woman will say "Thanks A Lot" when she is really ticked off at you. It is usually followed by the "Loud Sigh." This signifies that you have hurt her in some callous way. Be careful not to ask what is wrong after the "Loud Sigh," as she will only tell you "Nothing".
In the beginning, God created the earth and rested.
Then God created Man and rested.
Then God created Woman.
Since then, neither God nor Man has rested.
Well I don't know if I have any ideas for the manual itself, but you could put it on the computer on a CD-Rom perhaps. I think adobe acrobat has an option to make a PFD file? Or maybe make it into a powerpoint presentation.
My church is having a Christmas party and this year we are to bring gag gifts. You bring a gift, mark it male or female and then the gifts are handed out in a random fashion. I need some suggestions of either things to buy or things to make. Be creative, but keep it clean (it is a church party after all).
By Suntydt from Tazwell, TN
The "poop" gifts are cute, without being nasty. (You make a cute little header card, and staple it to a small plastic bag of the "poop".) For example: mini marshmallows for snowman poop, raisinettes for reindeer poop, red and green jelly beans for elf poop, etc.
I think www.organizedchristmas.com still has some of the "headers" you can print for the snowman poop and reindeer poop.
A Necessity Box: a battery, toilet paper roll, small samples of toothpaste, and soap etc. Maybe, the Daily Bread, a can of coke or a small sample packet of coffee, a band-aid, a wet-wipe packet, used items like a calling card (since there's not pay phones anymore (!), a chocolate candy bar (gotta have chocolate!!), a pencil or pen, sun screen, a sample of TUMS, or Tylenol. If you have kids, let them also throw in the things they feel are necessities to get through life. You will be amazed at what the little tikes will want to add to your box! Let your imagination run for the fun of it. Depending what you put into your box, you will create a lot of laughs!
I like the idea of giving a heart shaped cookie and a valentine. Or, a plate of crumbs from coolie, cake , pie, whatever , and a note saying 'sorry, I got hungry".
This is what I do when I need a gag gift. I get a pack of batteries, any size and put a small handmade Christmas card from construction paper that says. Toy not included. It has always been a hit!
In my experience we call this a White Elephant party. We give each other completely random and truly unwanted gifts, with a card of true holiday spirit and tidings. Last year I got a half used and dried up jar of fishing stink bait!
I have given a sack of old "lonely" socks, a shoe horn, a handful of old ink pens and markers that don't quiet work, etc.
The entire point of the gift is the card and tidings. Meanwhile I still love the snowman poop gift bag which is really marshmallows. I have made some up this year with the colored ones and claim it is Elf poo. Have fun and Merry Christmas to you.
I'm in need of some ideas to make my boss a gag gift. I'm frugal, but he is cheap, cheap, cheap. So I thought it would be fun to pick at him for Christmas :) He has a great sense of humor so any ideas will be great. Thanks!
I had a boss, that always said "I'm hot". So for Christmas,we drew names, and I drew his.I bought him a tiny hand held fan, and wrote on the card "I hope this cools you off". Then I also bought him some real nice after shave. It was a new brand, at that time. Weezy
I went to a Christmas Party several years ago and we all were to bring a small gift or gag gift. One of the funniest gifts was a jar of pigs feet! Everyone laughed so hard at that, don't think I will ever forget that.
A dollar store piggy bank!
I would like a silly gag gift idea for Christmas. Someone told me about a poem with a Baby Ruth candy bar. I also did one a year ago for my son's fiance. She told him she wanted a 3 carat diamond and laughed, so I wrapped three little baby carrots up in a small box and gave them to her for Christmas. It was a hit.
By Lindaspy from South Beloit, IL
One year I gave away a bunch of old coffee mugs, complete with a humorous history of their time in my household.
Does anyone have the Santa poop poem?
By Phyllis from Massena, NY