Choosing a Baby Name

Family Names as Middle Names

My husband is a teacher so he was VERY particular about just what baby names would do - traditional, easy to spell, difficult to mock, wasn't the name of a difficult student he'd had, etc. I wanted a name that wasn't common or fussy and would look good on a business card. It also needed to flow when you had to yell their entire name across the playground or grocery store - lol!

When we named our children we ended up starting with their middle names, then picked first names that we liked that went well with them. My mother passed away when I was a kid, so I really wanted to name my daughter after her, but didn't like my mother's first name - so I gave my daughter my mother's middle name, Eve (my mother was born on Christmas Eve).

For my second child, a son, we had an easy time picking the middle name. Both my father and my father-in-law shared the same middle name. My son's middle name became, William, after both his grandfathers.

If my third child had been a girl we would have used my mother-in-law's first name for her middle name and named her Katherine Elaine, but since I was having a boy, we asked my mother-in-law to choose his middle name. The funny thing was that I knew she'd wanted to name my husband Michael but didn't get her way, so I was SURE she would choose Michael. After months of debating, looking through the family tree, and asking friends what they thought, guess what she ended up choosing? My youngest son's middle name is Michael.

Admittedly, if our family names hadn't been to my liking, I might not have gone this route, but it was really important to me to give the kids some history in their names. The kids all think it's really neat that they're named for their grandparents, and of course, their grandparents think it's pretty special too. :)

By Stephanie from Hillsboro, OR

How To Choose A Name For Your Baby

These tips are my opinions.

Don'ts:

• Don't be cruel to you child and name them a name that is hard to spell or pronounce.
• Don't name your child after a famous living person. You never know when/if that person will do something to embarrass or shame anyone sharing that name. If you must, give your child that name for a middle name. (A nearby school had to be renamed after the living person they named it for did something bad).
• Don't give your child names that sound like another word or could rhyme with some unpleasant word or is embarrassing.
• Don't let your child's initials spell something embarrassing.
• I wouldn't give my child a first name that's a name currently in the top ten, or maybe even twenty, names. I would give my child a first name that's in the top 100 though. I would want to pick a name that is liked by others, but not so well liked that there are several children of the same first name in class.

Do's:

• Do pick a name that will serve your child well for their entire life.
• If the two of you can't agree on a name: If it's a girl, the mom picks the first name and the dad picks the middle name to go with it. Or mom chooses three first names and dad chooses three middle names and try all combinations with your last name to see which sounds best. Vice versa for a boy. Say the name verbally in a pleasant voice and also a yelling voice. Write the name down and also the initials and see how it looks.
• Do think about any possible ways a name could be turned into a nickname and decide if that is a good or not so good nickname.
• Do look in a baby book or online to find out the meaning of a name.
• Do pick names that "flow" well together. It often works best to not have the first and middle names have the same number of syllables, and you certainly wouldn't want all three names to have the same number of syllables.
• If you have a common last name, you might want to pick a more unique first name. Likewise, if you have an unusual last name, you might want to pick a more common first name.
• Long first names go well with short last names, short first names go well with long last names.
• Pay attention to the vowels in your last name and try and have at least one or more of the same vowels in your first or middle name to tie them together.
• Do think extra hard if your child is a girl about what her first and middle names would sound like paired with a different last name or if her first and middle initials would spell something embarrassing with any other letter of the alphabet in the last space if she were to marry and change her last name.

By garnetgirl9 from Stoughton, WI

Family Baby Names

I can only share our experience with choosing a baby name.

On my side of the family, my grandfather was a Wallace, my father had the middle name Wallace. I was named after my grandfather so I was a 2nd. My family thought I should continue the tradition with Wallace as a first or middle name. Personally I hate the name Wallace, so my side of the family was slightly disappointed, but they accepted the name we chose.

On my wife's side of the family, her father really wanted a grandson named Gary Allen. Not really sure why, but he was pretty adamant if we had a son we should name him that. The only problem would be my last name is Lam so my son's initials would be GAL. Knowing how mean kids can be given ANY ammunition, that name was totally out of the picture. So my father-in-law was not happy.

What my wife and I decided was we needed names for our kids that didn't give other children ammo for abuse. It needed to be a name that the child would be happy with the rest of their life. But more importantly, it would be a name that had meaning for us and eventually them. A name that was distinct and strong to support their character. I grew up with what I considered a wishy-washy name and felt my self-esteem was vulnerable because of it.

So, consider family names, consider names that family members offer, consider what some of the nicknames could be for your child as they grow, but ultimately realize that choosing a name for your child AND HOW IT IS SPELLED is one of the most important decisions you are going to make for your child. They have to live with it the rest of their life.

If you have NO ideas for names and no one in your family makes any offers, there are MANY name books and websites for choosing names. They also give the general meaning of the name. If you are really pressed for a name and can't get on the internet or go to a book store there is a book you can reference right in your own house (almost every house has one). It's called a phone book and it is FULL of names. :)

Source: 3 children

By Suntydt from Tazewell, TN