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If your child is dead-set on having a birthday party with a cartoon character's theme, keep to your budget by using solid colored paper plates, napkins, and cups from the dollar store, and then just buy the paper tablecloth and a grocery cake in that theme (or make your own cake and add decorations with that cartoon character or theme). Balloons and streamers are cheap options that really make a space look festive. Set up fun, low-cost games for the kids to play, and don't waste a lot of money on treat bags.
Here's a script: "Honey, we will do the best birthday party our money will buy. Here are three choices. Which would you like?" If she gets mad, put them away and say "We'll talk later when you are ready." Leave the three ideas out on the counter later.
You don't say how old she is but you are the parent and you have to control the purse strings. Set a limit and stick to it.
My mom for my 18th birthday gave me a dinner party for my best friends and me. It was fantastic. My older sister (by 1 year) and I always had joint parties for our birthdays. They were 2 days apart. So we shared alot of the same friends and all through growing up, 30 girls in the house the first part of Dec was great. My friends still talk about our birthday parties. Nothing special, no one left out. My next birthday party was my 50th, 4 years ago.
How old is your daughter? My daughter just turned 6 and out of all the parties she has had her favorite is a "Princess Party". I found free Princess invitations online and printed them off and sent to her friends. I requested they dress up in their Princess outfits. Everyone dressed up and we set up the table with my daughter's tea set. I used a pink table cloth I purchased at Dollar Tree. I baked cupcakes and purchased icing and sprinkles, and allowed the girls to decorate their own cupcakes.
They played dress up all afternoon and played. We already had a Castle tent, so we set it up for them to play in. If you don't have one, let them build one out of chairs and blankets. Let their imagination run wild. Paint their nails, put make-up on them, etc. Ask your daughter what she would like to do. Very little money was spent but it was her best party ever.
She has had 2 Princess parties and just asked to have another one. :) If your daughter is older, do a make-over party. Have the girls bring hair accessories and nail polish and make-up. Have munchies on hand and they'll do the rest. Have them make their own cupcakes or cookies. Girls love to cook. At least my daughter does. Ask your daughter for a theme and see what she likes.