My Child Won't Poop In The Potty

My 3 year old always poops in his pants. One morning he woke up about 3am, while I was asleep. He had no pants on and he put his pillow under his bare bum and started pooing on it. I smelled something and went to see him and found the pillow. In frustration I smacked his bum. He said, " poop poopy poop" and wiggled his bum and said, "Can you put me on the pottie?" I said, "No, you do it." and he he just stood there and started pooing in his pants. Please help.



August 30, 20100 found this helpful

You need to find something that will motivate him! It's not that difficult once you find that one thing! If he's into a certain toy then put all those toys away until he uses the potty chair, then allow him to play with them for a few hours and after his nap or dinner etc. put them away again until he uses the potty chair again. He will learn really fast how to get what he wants and in the process you will have gotten what YOU wanted. Good luck.

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August 30, 20100 found this helpful

He is so in a power struggle with you and he is winning. Have a friend who has been through potty training take him for a day, maybe two if you can work it out. He will be pleased to obey the requests that she needs to point out to him.

"In our house, we use the potty. We do not do anything in our pants. We must wear our underwear all day under our clothing. We use the potty, wash out hands to make sure they are clean. When they are clean after we use the bathroom, we go into the kitchen for something special--or find something that is special. You will be responsible for telling me when you have to use the bathroom. You are a big boy and you will use it like the rest of us.

Mom, you have to back off and let friend do this to get your power back. When successful at friends house, have them bring him home to show what he has learned.

One daycare was across the street and her own daughter was the problem, so she brought her to my daycare. Yep. Like a charm in 1 day. I set the timer and attached it to her clothing so every 20 minutes we were to the bathroom. She was 4 at the time.

Poop messes? Put some gloves on the kid and tell him to clean it up. We clean up after dogs accidents, tell him people clean up after their own. You can clean up what has to after he is out of sight. If you don't you will be cleaning poop from the underwear for years to come. Poop in the pans is a power play.

With my daycare and grandchildren, we start sitting on the potty at about 7 months. Clothes on. Then we wash, and are done. As they get older, by 10 months, 12 months, loose the pants, sit with diaper on. Go through the washing cycle. Routine needs to be learned. So when the child is ready any where from 15 months to 18 months, they know the pattern. No reason not to ditch diapers by age 2. Unless you let them control you. These are steps of development that if they are not met, you need to make sure you are catching. I teach American Sign language and we use that from about 9 months on. So teach the potty sign as well. They can communicate, they are not stupid.

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August 30, 20100 found this helpful

One additional thought. How many fruit snacks do the kids get? That is made from fruit pectin. What is pectin for? Thickening juices to make jams, jellies, and ultimately constipating. We could not figure why granddaughter had the issue at home, but not my house. I don't buy junk. They get the real deal. Fresh fruits, and the bowels will get into action.

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August 31, 20100 found this helpful

Hello, Please do not spank him! Call your Dr. and ask them for any suggestions. My grandson had the same problem and he is fine now.

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August 31, 20100 found this helpful

My two year old nephew will pee and poop on the potty as long as he doesn't have a diaper on. I let him run around the house naked. He tells me if he needs to pee and he goes to the potty. when he needs to poop , he asks for a diaper so we make it fun and race to the potty. I bought him his own big boy undies and said Don't poop on spongebob, he will not be happy. So he is learning to go potty.

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September 21, 20100 found this helpful

I would love it if mine at least told me to put him on the potty instead of asking for a diaper. shame on you! I can understand the the swat on the bum after him pooing on the pillow, but if he asks to be put on the potty, please do it.

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December 20, 20100 found this helpful

Hi I understand the frustration you must be going through, and I have not had my boys poo on anything but their underwear, but I too cannot get them to use the toilet for anything other than peeing in it they got that down pack. I cannot wait until they start using the potty for all of it. The only thing I did not agree with in your posting was about spanking your child and refusing to take him to the toilet. He won that war when you did those things.

My suggestion is to continue to reinforce the potty chair by sitting him on the toilet, and like the other poster said, "Have him clean up his own mess with using protective gear from any potential germs". That is the one thing we as a parent must do even how frustrating it gets we got to remain patient with them and resilient in the fight of the potty training issues that arise, and be prepared to handle it in a way that make the child secure enough to use the toilet not afraid of it.

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January 6, 20110 found this helpful

I cracked it after 12 months! I have been reading posts on here for a few months trying different things to get my son to do a poo in the potty and not in his pants! He is 3 and 3 months, I potty trained him 12 months ago, it took a week and was dry, only problem we could not it get him to do a poo, he would hide somewhere trying to hold it in and then we would have a day or two of small bits in his pants 4 or 5 times a day.

I tried rewards, saying 'dont worry next time tell mummy', getting really cross and shouting then feeling guilty after, it really was taking over my life! I was sick of cleaning soiled pants. I even put nappies back on for 2 months but that didn't help him to relax. Then a friend told me about a book called pooland you print it off the internet and read it every night. So I thought ill give it a go. 4 nights I read the book still nothing, he was still trying to hold it in and small accidents in pants (although he loves the book and wanted to read it twice!) Then one afternoon he had held it in for 6 days, I lost it a bit and said "If you don't sit on the potty and push out a poo I'll have to call the doctor! (I got my phone and pretended to speak to the doctor) and he will have to do an operation on your bottom and get the poo out!". Well he couldn't get on the potty quick enough and within about 5 seconds he done a poo in the potty!

We have carried on reading the pooland book and giving treats and rewards etc, and I remind him about calling the doctor every now and then and he has done poo no problem every day for 10 days, it's a miracle! Looking at the big picture I think he was confused about pooing and the book definitely helped explain it all in a childlike way, as well as that a little bit of fear, I think he just couldn't let go and the doctor coming sounded worse than doing it himself.

(I also give him a spoonful of lactrolose at breakfast just in case he was worried about it being painful but will stop that soon). x

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February 23, 20110 found this helpful

The booklet that Hayley mentions, that really helps this problem is called Ollie Helps Poo Go Home to PooLand. It really does work... its a colouring in booklet written so that young ones really understand the concept of geting the Poo's down the Loo.

You can get it at Bedtime And Toilet Training Solutions

So helped me tooo.

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September 29, 20110 found this helpful

I am at my wits end about the whole poop in underwear thing too.

We have tried:

*bribing" our daughter with treats

*bribing" her with offers of a new toy

*taking toys away

*putting her back in pull-ups

Have any of these worked? No! We have scolded her, tried to explain it to her, put her in time outs, made her sit on the potty for sometimes 30 minutes. Nothing, nothing, nothing! We are sick of it!

We can't afford to be putting pull ups on any more. So we are trying that poo land book now, thanks for the idea! And I'm currently letting her wear only her shirt around the house in hopes of "oh no, I don't have anywhere to poop!" comes through her mind and she uses the potty.

Just can't take anymore poop in the underwear!

Personally, I think putting the kids back in pull-ups or diapers, actually doesn't help unless your kid is really old enough to understand how big of a set back that is. With our youngest daughter, she just started peeing in the pull-up again, and didn't do anything different with poop, except pooped all at once instead of 4+ times in a day like she did with underwear.

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