Clingy Toddler

My sister has a 17 month old son who just HANGS off her constantly. I know it's normal for kids that age to have seperation anxiety, but this is beyond that. Even if my sister is just at home having coffee or reading a mag, little things like that, her son is sitting on her lap or hanging off her hip. He won't go and play with his older brother or go play on his own. He just follows her around the house all day whining until she picks him up. It's really starting to get to her, especially as she has another one on the way and has awful morning sickness. Any tips on how to combat this would be appreciated. It's very frustrating to see her go through this and not be able to help at all!

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Haley from Albany, Western Australia

January 8, 20070 found this helpful

try http://www.familycorner.com/dir/Parenting/Health/

also, has she tried redirecting his attention..do an activity a couple of times until he sees he is having fun (in an area where she can be seen)

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January 8, 20070 found this helpful

Positive reinforcement of playing with brothers or alone.

Negative reinforcement for unwarranted clinginess.

If she is giving him attention every time he touches her, she is reinforcing his behavior, rewarding him, and he will continue to do that.

This is not going to make him happy or her.

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January 8, 20070 found this helpful

it sounds like he knows she will give in. put him in a room where he will be safe and either close the door or put up a gate and get to where he cant see her. seperate them for more each day i bet he would get the hang of it.

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January 8, 20070 found this helpful

I am not trying to start anything, but OMG. If you put your child in a room and closed the door, it will upset them so bad they would cling even worse to their mother. What I suggest and I am no expert, but give him some away time. Like aunty or another relative take him a couple of places a week for a little while. Bring a sibling so he gets the idea to play with that sibling and when he is at home, maybe he will feel the urge to continue playing with that older brother or sister.

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January 8, 20070 found this helpful

The child knows his mom is going to pick him up and hold him every time he whines.I had one the same way so what I did was tell him "NO,I'm not picking you up", with a very firm voice and let him cry for a little while,it will drive you bananas listening to it but if she picks him up at all it should be to tell him she loves him and gives him a kiss then put him right back down.after awhile he will see his mom isn't going to hold him.he will find some toys or something else to focus his attention on.it's terrible to spoil a child that way and we learned the hard way that it was harder to break the habit of holding the child because he screamed something awful,but please don't give in.or you've lost the battle.

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January 8, 20070 found this helpful

Hi guys, thanks for the advice. I might try taking him for a bit a couple of times a week. As I work, it's a bit hard to do it too much!! But we'll get there!!!

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January 10, 20070 found this helpful

I take my toddler to a PMO (parents morning out) program once or twice a week. Many church's offer this and it has really made a difference for our little girl. Plus I get 4 1/2 hours of ME time!! Also, its very affordable. Here is a picture of her and one of her buddies having fun at "school"!

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June 9, 20080 found this helpful

I'm having the same problem with my 15 month old. When I pick her up, she wants to be put down and then picked back up again over and over again! I think shes working me over! LOL

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January 1, 20090 found this helpful

Mine is 3 and is very clingy. But....he is a happy and healthy little boy. We are working on teaching him some independence and redirecting his attention, it takes time and consistency (the most important). Shutting him in a room because he wants to be held sounds very wrong and will teach him nothing. I was shut into a room as a little girl and only felt unloved and scared.

I can't hardly ride in an elevator or be in a small room now as an adult. Please dont do that. Positive reinforcement helps, I also have been keeping little toys in my purse for when we are out. His hands are busy, no problems with him touching everything (wish it would work for my hubby) and his attention is on the toy.

Good luck, I hope this helped, even though some stuff is from 1 year ago, you probably have the other baby now and more chaos. Best wishes.

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