Help with Tonsurephobia- Fear of Hair Cuts

I am 17 and I've always been scared of getting my hair cut. Is this reason to bite the bullet and shave it all off? How can I work up the courage?

By Amy from UK

March 23, 20100 found this helpful

I understand! Because I also have always been afraid of getting my hair cut. As a female, I just let my hair grow down to my waist, until recently, when I cut 12 inches off of my own hair (I wouldn't recommend cutting your own hair, but I have a little experience in this, cutting my kids & boyfriends hair for the last 30 years)

If you really think you need or want a hair cut, then go to a quality salon because they take more time with you & you won't be rushed. How do you know if it's a "quality" salon? Look for the name of someone famous like "Vidal Sassoon" or "Gean Juarez". Or you can Google "Top Rated Hair Salons" in your area. Ask around!

A quality salon will do a free consolation where you can explain your problem & see how you like what they offer. You will pay $60 or $75 (& sometimes even $100) instead of the $12 at a quickie "super-cut" places, but they will take the extra time you need & you won't be rushed. Also, you can ask for the most experienced stylist at the salon (someone who has been cutting hair for the longest time). But remember, the longer someone has been cutting hair, the more money they charge. So save your money!

As I said earlier, here in the USA, the better salon's do a free first-time consultation so you can decide if you like what they offer. But, even if you don't get your hair cut from them, you can at least go in & decide if you like what they offer. If not, go to someone else! You want someone with patience who takes their time & doesn't make you feel like they are rushing. Just call around & talk to different salons. Also, when you make your appointment be sure to tell the receptionist what's going on with you.

Also: I stop people (women & men) all the time in public & ask them where they got their hair cut if I really like their hair. Don't be afraid to do this! Ask them "Who cut's your hair?" & they will appreciate the fact that you noticed & everyone loves to talk about a stylist (or barber) that they absolutely love! This is how I found a wonderful stylist back in my youth.

Make sure you tell them how much time & effort you want to spend to do your hair each day. Some styles are easy & some take much longer & are harder to achieve. If you have naturally curly hair, make sure you go to someone who knows naturally curly hair! Don't be afraid to leave somewhere if you feel uncomfortable & go to some place else. If you love your new hair cut, be sure to tip the stylist well!

* If you have long hair, don't just cut it all off before you are sure. First, go to a wig store & try on short-hair wigs in the style you think you may want. Also, I would tell them you want your hair still long enough to be able to put it into a pony tail, because there will be days when you don't want to hassle with "doing" your hair & there's nothing like a pony-tail when you are cleaning house, going swimming or in a big hurry!

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March 23, 20100 found this helpful

I personally don't have any experience with this problem. If you don't mind my asking, what about getting your hair cut bothers you? Knowing that might help in finding a solution. I worry that if you fear getting your hair cut, shaving it off might be just as (or maybe even more) traumatic.

I have my own phobias, and I've learned how to cope with them. I know it can be rough. Best of luck to you!

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March 25, 20100 found this helpful

Are you afraid it will not look right or are you afraid of the process? If it is the first, remember that hair always grows back. If it is the last, then I suggest you trim the ends of your hair yourself. If you get through that without panic you might let an expert take one inch off. Gradually you might overcome your fear. However, if it sends you into a panic, there is no reason to cut it. Find a nice style for long hair and wear it. It isn't worth getting upset over. Tell people to leave you alone about it. It is your hair to cut or not to cut, as you see fit.

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March 25, 20100 found this helpful

If you do decide to cut your hair, let it grow long enough to donate about 12 inches to a child with cancer, for a wig. That alone should give you the courage. You will be glad you did. I wish I had hair, long or not. And I agree, If you like it don't cut it. Hope you do what is best for YOU. Be of good cheer. GG.Vi

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March 27, 20100 found this helpful

Ask around your friends to see if there's a "mellow" stylist who could trim or cut your hair after you explain the problem. I don't have the same degree of apprehension or fear and this might not apply to you at all, but I get angry and all bent-out-of-shape if a haircut isn't just what I wanted.

This is coupled with a usual inability to explain exactly what I want. I have finally found someone who doesn't not care, but lets me go on and then approximates what I want. Somehow, the lack of "yes, yes, exactly" soothes me enough that I accept what I get.

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