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When we started on a drastic debt-repayment plan, we had no extra money for anything but the absolute barest necessities for almost five years. I couldn't even shop at thrift stores for clothes -- that would've been too expensive for our severely limited budget. We learned to make things ourselves, accept hand-me-downs from friends and family, make do with what we had, or do without. It was either live like that or be forced into Bankruptcy by our impatient and increasingly nasty creditors.
We chose to knuckle under and do what needed to be done, no matter how difficult, in order to pay off our creditors (mainly some huge hospital bills from three premature babies).
One of the fist things I noticed when we started our debt repayment plan was the discontent that seemed to overtake me almost constantly. I started praying that I would discover where this discontent was coming from so I could overcome it and put it to rest.
Well, it turned out (for me at the time) that the main Contentment Robbers were:
1) Mail-order Catalogs
The beautiful items in these catalogs were a constant reminder of all the "wonderful" things I couldn't have anymore -- I overcame this Contentment Robber by tossing all catalogs into the recycling bin as soon as they arrived without even glancing at them.
2) Shopping Malls
I hadn't realized how much "recreational shopping" breeds discontent -- I started avoiding malls at all costs unless I had something specific I needed to buy -- and even then I only went in for what was on my list and then I hurried back out before I got distracted by some new housewares store (my personal weakness).
3) Commercial Television
Seeing all the latest and greatest constantly paraded before my eyes bred discontent -- I turned off the TV except to watch videos from the library or PBS specials with my kids.
4) Womens' Magazines
I cancelled my subscriptions -- I didn't have many magazine subscriptions but the pages of the ones I did have showed perfect homes, beautiful clothes, pampering personal toiletries, etc., which really caused me to begin suffering from a form of lust (maybe "greed" is another word for it?).
5) Shopping Channels / The Internet
I've never watched Shopping Channels on TV but I suppose they're probably contentment robbers for some people. Also certain "malls" and "shopping" areas on the Internet would serve as contentment robbers, as well.
But probably the biggest surprise of all to me was that the longer I practiced frugal living and read books on the topic, I found that I was more satisfied by the simpler pursuits I was discovering than I ever was by all the shopping and personal luxury items that I had previously considered such a treat.
Well, we're no longer in debt (Hooray!!) and money's still tight (being a single income family of five means money is always tight), but I'm not discontent anymore. I have great satisfaction knowing that our debts are "Paid in Full." The accomplishment of paying off our debts is a great luxury in and of itself!
Plus, through the process of getting our finances in order, I've gained a new appreciation for the beauty and joy of life's simpler pleasures. Shopping and acquiring new stuff holds little appeal for me anymore. Now I would much rather spend a day hiking a Nature Trail and picnicking in a meadow with my kids, than spending an expensive afternoon sauntering around the Mall eating designer cinnamon rolls and sipping gourmet coffees.
But those weren't always my priorities ... I can honestly say I'm much more content since my priorities and ideas of luxuries have changed.
About The Author: Copyright 2002 Deborah Taylor-Hough
Used with permission. All rights reserved.
Deborah Taylor-Hough (free-lance writer, wife and mother of three) is the author of "A Simple Choice: A Practical Guide to Saving Your Time, Money and Sanity" and the bestselling book, "Frozen Assets: How to cook for a day and eat for a month (Champion Press). To subscribe to her free, twice-monthly email newsletter, Simple Times, email to: subscribe-simple-times@hub.thedollarstretcher.com Visit Debi online at: http://hometown.aol.com/dsimple/
By
07/02/2006
You raise some very good points. Over the years one of the things that I've learned is happiness doesn't have much to do with getting what we want: happiness is about wanting... and appreciating... what we have. Without getting preachy here, I have to say that it helps me to take a few moments every day and thank God for my many blessings. Among other things, this reminds *me* how wonderful my life is even when my problems seem insurmountable.
All my life I've known people who delighted in telling everyone how much money they paid for that expensive new item. They are actually proud to say they spent $80,000 for a car or $500 for a watch or suit of clothes. Folks, if I did that I certainly wouldn't tell anybody because I wouldn't want anyone to know I was that stupid. I drive an ugly '89 van that needs some mechanical work and a paint job. Well, I don't care that it is ugly; I don't look too good myself. What I do care about is that it goes where I point it and stops when I get there, and that I paid $500 cash for it five or six years ago. If it died today it wouldn't owe me a cent. And there's another benefit to driving old, ugly vehicles: people are less likely to pull out in front of them. Other drivers can see that I don't have much to lose by ramming them so they seldom risk it.
Watches: I've had some nice (though not too expensive) ones over the years. The last was an old Elgin that finally died. I paid a jeweler $35 to fix it and it ran fine for awhile, then would stop for no reason. So I bought a new ugly Casio bare-bones digital wristwatch for $18. It had a seven year warranty on the battery, but kept near perfect time for over ten years before the battery died. I gave it away and bought another one, the replacement for the model I had, for $21, and with a ten year battery warranty. It has gained 17 seconds since the last daylight savings time change. I can live with that level of imperfection, and nobody is going to smash my head in to steal it. All in all from a purely functional standpoint I prefer it to a gold Rolex.
Life is good and it's too short for us to spend it worrying about such things. The two major rules of contentment? (1) "Don't sweat the small stuff", and (2) "It's *all* small stuff!"
By
06/28/2006
You are a woman after my own heart! I've long felt that shopping malls are a lot of what's wrong with Americans,
young and old alike. My idea of a luxury is a one of a kind whimsical item found in a curio shop or yard sale.
It's sad to hear what worthless items people hold dear, trading their contentment to gain them. Keep up the good work!
God Bless
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