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Thank you ladies, for all of your advice! Better late than never, I just wanted to say that the whitener/brightener did work to take most of the gray out of my polyester shirt! And without ruining the other colors. I've worn it since and had many compliments!
Also, the oxy clean miraculously helped the 1960's dress - but tragically the dress fell pray to clothes moths!!! Apparently it was not synthetic after all. I will save some of the fabric to make something else at some point...it is too beautiful to just throw away.
Finally, thank you Sandy, for the recipe, I have it pinned up and at the ready for my next crisis!
Rit color/dye remover will most likely work. I have used it on colored synthetics with no problems. After you get the dye out of the white, wash the shirt with a bit of salt to set the black dye so this won't happen again.
Have you tried oxyclean? It really helps whiten my clothes and removes some stains. I haven't tried it on polyester because most of our stuff is cotton. I put the oxyclean in the washer (5 scoops for a full load) with hot water and as soon as there is enough water to dissolve the oxyclean, I switch to cold and put the clothes in the washer. Let them soak overnight. I don't think this would harm the clothes. Good luck!
I have used rit whitener/brightner on yellow and pink items to remove dinginess and it worked great. I have also used it on striped t-shirts to take the grey out of the white stripe and it worked fine.
I use the following:
1/2 cup Cascade powdered dish detergent
1/2 cup bleach
dissolve in one gallon of pretty warm water and soak items for a few hours or overnight. This has always worked for me and anyone else I've told about it. My Mom has used it for years also.
Sandy from Pittsburgh