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Asking a Guy Friend to a Dance?

January 4, 2008

Friendly teen couple pose casually for picture at a school danceI'm really good friends with this guy from another school. I haven't seen him in person for a couple months, but I talk to him on the phone everyday. I really like him and I want to ask him to my school's dance that's coming up. I want to ask him in a simple way, nothing fancy, but I don't know how to bring the dance up in conversation. I need help fast because I only have ONE WEEK until I have to ask him.

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just ME! from Cincinnati, OH

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By Cindy (Guest Post)
January 4, 20080 found this helpful
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Start talking about school then say my school is having a school dance, is yours? Hey I got a great idea want to go together?
And It is as simple as that.

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January 4, 20080 found this helpful
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If you talk with him everyday you must get along great. Just tell him about the dance and how you think it would be a nice/fun way for you to get together and hangout since you havent been able to hangout in a long time.

I would tell him as soon as you can though, just in case he makes other plans he cant get out of. And he'll have to make sure he can make it out to where you're out and have something to wear.

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By Pat. (Guest Post)
January 5, 20080 found this helpful
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Bless your heart. Don't be shy . Just come out and ask him. I asked my husband to a play at my highschool. We've been married 36 years! Good luck!

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By (Guest Post)
January 8, 20080 found this helpful
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Make him a candy bar card & have another friend deliver it or hang it on his locker. Buy candy bars & snacks, then work the titles into sentences. You could put stuff like:

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"It's fun to be with you, because you make me"SNICKER".
"Going out with you would be "MOUNDS" of fun!"
"Be a "LIFESAVER" & go with me to the dance."
You get the idea - be creative & make it fun! How could he say no if you put a little effort into it?

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6 More Questions

Ask a QuestionHere are the questions asked by community members. Read on to see the answers provided by the ThriftyFun community or ask a new question.

October 6, 2017

I have a formal coming up in November on the 6th. I have a friend who is a senior and I am a junior, but I would like to ask him to the dance. He and I are friends and have known each other for 3 years now, but we don't hang out except in JROTC which is the only class he and I have together. Sometimes he compliments me about how I look and last year at the military ball for JROTC the song "A Thousand Years" by Christina Perri came on and he asked me if I wanted to dance to it and I said yes.

I like him, but I don't want to make things weird between us by asking him to formal. Any advice for if I should ask him or not? And if I should tell him how I feel?

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October 6, 20170 found this helpful
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Sure, why not ask him? It's a dance not a steady commitment. It's always best to be upfront and honest about your feelings and intentions so nobody has to guess what they are.

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I say give it a shot!

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Diamond Post Medal for All Time! 1,246 Posts
October 7, 20170 found this helpful
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I'd suggest going with him in a very casual way. I wouldn't go all out with a fancy invite. It sounds like you two have a good rapport, so just mention you'd like to go, ask him if he was thinking of going... If yes, offer to go together.

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Diamond Post Medal for All Time! 1,298 Posts
October 7, 20170 found this helpful
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You two sound like you have a good background and long established friendship. I don't see why you shouldn't ask him.

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:)

Do you know any of his friends? Just to see if he is already planning to ask someone or has been asked?

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August 10, 2017

My friend and I have been best friends since 5th grade. Now we're going into our freshman year and that also means homecoming. He is always kinda sad and he knows I'm always there if he needs someone to talk to. This year I want to ask him to homecoming, but I only want to ask as friends.

My reason is that, I have a boyfriend, but we don't really want to go public yet. I already discussed this with him and he is fine with me asking my friend to the dance. My problem is, how exactly am I supposed to clarify that I am asking him to be my date to the dance, but only as friends?

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Gold Post Medal for All Time! 677 Posts
August 10, 20170 found this helpful

I would be honest. Tell him he is a dear friend and you'd love to go to the dance with him and your boyfriend is fine with it.

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Bronze Post Medal for All Time! 105 Posts
August 10, 20170 found this helpful

I would let him know how much you value his friendship and how over the years the friendship has grown. Also tell him about your boyfriend if he doesn't already know. Be honest with him and up front.

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I would tell him that you want to go to the homecoming dance with him and why you want him to go with you. I am sure he will be happy to accompany you to the dance.

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Gold Feedback Medal for All Time! 949 Feedbacks
August 11, 20171 found this helpful

Since you are already good friends talking honestly about the event should not be a problem but maybe you should start with a reminder that you and he are good friends and, as a friend, you would like to see him happy and you think the two of you going to this event together would make both of you happy.
If he knows about your boyfriend then you could also say that you have discussed it with him and the also thinks it is a good idea.
You do not say why he is "kinda" sad but if just being in your company - as a friend - makes him feel better, then he should be able to accept your offer/request in that same light.

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Diamond Post Medal for All Time! 1,246 Posts
August 11, 20170 found this helpful

Tell him you guys should go as friends in a friendly-suggestion type of way. Don't make it seem romantic or lovey in the least! Also make sure you mention a couple times your boyfriend is cool with it.

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It should be fine. Just make sure you come across as just friends from beginning to end. And have fun!!

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Silver Post Medal for All Time! 433 Posts
August 11, 20172 found this helpful

Just be honest and explain it to him the way you did here.

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August 11, 20170 found this helpful

You say all your mutual friends know about your boyfriend and you say the friend you want to ask is your best friend since 5th grade has not been told. So why aren't you ready to tell him about your boyfriend? You are very concerned in making sure he knows this is just a friendship date. Is it that your best friend has feelings for you and you know it? If so, he could get hurt if you tell him you have a boyfriend but you want him to go with you to an event as friends only.

Why can you not go public with your boyfriend? I suspect that your boyfriend is not a suitable companion for you and the adults in your life would not approve. Something is wrong here.

Bottomline, If you can't be honest with your friend, you need to find another date for homecoming.

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Diamond Post Medal for All Time! 1,298 Posts
August 12, 20172 found this helpful

That's very sweet that your boyfriend is allowing you to ask your best friend to homecoming.

Tell him, let's go to homecoming together as friends! Nothing further.

You're both friends since 5th grade so asking him to homecoming shouldn't spark anything. And he probably knows you have a crush on someone else like your boyfriend perhaps?

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September 3, 2012

How can I ask my guy friend to a semi formal dance? My crush and I have been good friends for a while and there is a semi formal dance coming up. I really want to ask him, but one he is a year older than me and I don't know of he will take me seriously. Secondly, I don't want to make this friendship weird. Please help!

By Taylor

Answers

September 5, 20120 found this helpful
Best Answer

Unfortunately, there is no guaranteed way to ask him that will make sure that he will react in the perfect way. There is always a risk that he will either feel like you are more of a friend and he might feel a little uncomfortable, or that he might go with you and it might make you both feel uncomfortable later.

However, if you really, really like this guy and are willing to take that risk, then, hey, go for it! You have to be prepared for either possibility, but when you feel something special, it is worth the risk.

I would just straight out tell him that you think he should go with you to the dance. You don't have to even tell him that you want it to be as a date--you can just see how he reacts first. If he acts uncomfortable, you can say that you should just go as friends, if not, then just see where it takes you. Be ready for anything, and keep your cool no matter what happens. Good luck!

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September 8, 20120 found this helpful
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Just ask him! Go for it. You only live once, might as well have some fun. Take a risk. If you don't, you'll beat yourself up for not doing it because what if he would of said yes?!

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January 22, 2020

I want to ask this guy to snowcoming, we don't really talk, but we used to. I also don't know if he is already going with someone or not and I don't know what I should do.


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September 18, 2019

I wanna ask my close friend to the school dance. I've known him since day one of 6th grade and now we're in our freshman year. I wanna know if I should ask him or if I should lay off. Mostly everybody in our grade ships the two of us, but the one problem is he has mentioned liking another girl. He only mentions her to me and not his other friends. I'm not sure if that's a sign.


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Gold Post Medal for All Time! 677 Posts
September 18, 20190 found this helpful

If your friend were interested in you as more than a friend, he would have been making the move. Since he didn't, keep in mind that if you do ask him to the dance, it will be as a friend. I think he probably will ask the other girl.

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October 5, 2013

I have a friend in school and we have been good friends for quite a while. Yesterday I got thinking and I really want to ask him to my semi formal in December, but I have no clue how. Some details: I have a boyfriend that can't go to the dance, so I just want to go with him as friends. And I don't want him to think I'm hitting on him.

By Kaley G.

Answers

October 3, 20170 found this helpful

I'm going through the same situation. I have no idea how to ask him and make it obvious it is just as friends. but the question is does he have anyone he's wanting to go with or are the chances of him going with someone slim to none. Since my friend is single and he probably won't get a date, I'm planning on bringing up that since neither of us have a date we should go together.

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