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As newly retired parents to three young adult children, we have decided as a family to reframe our Christmas into something more meaningful than gifts to us. Rather than buying and receiving expensive items that our young adult children can't afford (with college loans and life expenses), we are starting new traditions with our family. Maybe you might want to use one or two yourself!
Here are some suggestions:
*To enjoy the grab bag, each person rolls a pair of dice. If they roll a 7 or 11 they choose one of the miscellaneous wrapped gifts and just hold on to it. When all the gifts have been taken, then you set a 2 minute timer and start rolling again. This time the 7 or 11 winner gets to TAKE a gift from one of the other players. You could make it the person's gift on the LEFT for a 7 and the person's gift on the RIGHT for an 11. If it's your OWN gift, you can choose to take the OPPOSITE side's gift. It's really just for fun and it won't come out evenly, which is why I suggest this for an adult game, not children. Of course after opening these small gifts, anyone can trade them around if desired.
We are still hanging Christmas stockings for all three of the kids (and a fiancé) where anyone can add anything special if they'd like. So parents can still get a low key way to give gift checks, gift cards or cash to help your young adults out without making them feel bad not having lavish gifts abound.
Personally, I told my kids that a gift to me could be a donation to mine or their favorite charitable organization (they can always use it!) or a donation of a food item for a food kitchen or local animal shelter.
I would also appreciate a handmade ornament with the current year's date on it for my tree. I especially like small framed photos of the family.
Happy Holidays Everyone! May you have a loving a meaningful time with your loved ones!
Because we now have 4 generations of relatives we hire a hall. We do this about the 2nd Sunday of December. That way everyone knows every year when to plan to celebrate. The hall is decorated with a tree with ornaments and we have holiday music playing (a boom box). Folding tables provided by the hall are set up with chairs and disposable holiday tablecloths are put on them. (We wait until after Christmas each year and when they go on sale, we buy them and put them away for next year).
Everyone brings their special dish to share and this is displayed on a separate long large table. This year we had chicken wings, ham, turkey, meatballs, potato salad, macaroni salad, tossed salad, homemade bread, dinner rolls, pizza, and many, many delicious desserts. One of my aunts makes a traditional dish called bacala which is a fish dish made from soaked codfish and then cooked into a soup like dish. It is so good and it is the only day out of the whole year that I get to eat it. I even bring a little container with me and bring some home and the next day I cook some linguine and heat the bacala up and pour it over. I feel like I have died and gone to heaven. It is so g.o.o.d.
Santa pays a visit dressed in his royal attire with a beard thrown in and offers gifts to all the little ones as well as the big ones. It's nice to see how the little kids have grown, to hear how they are doing whether in nursery school, regular school, college or in the working field. My aunts, cousins, their children and their children (4 generations) mingle and laugh and break bread. This is a tradition that my nona and nono had when they were alive in their home. Then when they died their children took turns every year hosting it at their home. It finally got to a point that there were close to 60 of us so we rent a hall now. I hope this continues for the rest of my life and then is handed down to the next generation to keep doing it. I look forward to it every year.
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At Christmas, my family usually all get together to celebrate. Our family is very multi-cultural, and this year, our house will be the gathering place. We have family members who are from India, who are Jewish, and African.
I know that in the past, we've only celebrated Xmas. I would like to be able to celebrate all, but I don't really know how to "integrate" everything in a smooth manner that won't offend anyone. Any suggestions?
By Brenda Burns from CA
Have you spoken to your family members to ask for ideas? They might be excited about celebrating other holidays beside Christmas and even be willing to pitch in to help make the gathering at your home extra special.
For the Jewish Hannukah holiday, the most recognizable symbol is the Menorah, which has 9 candle holders:
8 for each of the 8 days of Hannukah, and one in the middle which is the shamash ("helper or servant"), the candle used to light the other candles.
This year Hannukah is from sunset on Dec 11 to sunset Dec 19. Hannukah is spelled other ways too, like Chanukah or Chanukkah or Hanukah.
The menorah and the candles celebrate the miracle of light, when olive oil in the ancient temple was only enough for one day, but miraculously lasted 8 days.
Having a menorah up at Christmas time would be very appropriate and welcome.
Your might consider having a holiday buffet dinner and have everyone bring their favorite family dishes to share with everyone.
I would think that honoring everyone's traditions would not be offensive to anyone! Contrary to what you may have heard, most Jewish people don't mind if they are wished a "Merry Christmas", and most Christians don't mind hearing about and celebrating other traditions.
Maybe you can do dessert from one culture, starters from another, sides from another, main from another. And ask the members to make the authentic dishes.