Aggressive 3 Year Old Step Daughter?

My 3 year old step daughter is very aggressive with her younger sister, who is 22 months old. She is always hitting, biting, kicking, pushing and pinching her. There have been multiple times when the little one has even shed blood at the hands of her sister with scratches and bites. Once she even pushed her off the bed, resulting her in biting through part of her lip.


We tried timeouts, and standing in the corner, and extra chores for being naughty and other forms of punishment, but nothing seems to affect her. Today she crossed a line when the little one started screaming bloody murder, so I ran to the room. The oldest had her hands wrapped around her sister's head, and was pulling with all her might. When I asked what she was doing she said she was trying to take her head off.

Her father and I are not violent people. My kids do not watch violent TV, so I don't know where all her violence is coming from. I fear that soon my little one will get seriously hurt, if something doesn't change. I don't know what do to. I am completely at a loss. If anyone has any advice on what I can do to show her it's not okay, and to make her stop using her sister as her punching bag, I am all ears.


We do not spank or hit our children. We don't handle violence with violence. So I am looking to peaceful ideas, please.

By C.Mariah

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April 8, 20141 found this helpful

Please talk to your pediatrician about this situation. I think your child should be evaluated by a professional.

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April 8, 20141 found this helpful

Please seek professional help immediately. You are putting your younger child in danger every time you leave them alone. There is something wrong and you need to find out what it is before you lose both of them. Please get help right away. I've seen this before... you have no time to waste.

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April 8, 20140 found this helpful

I also urge you to seek professional help. I would suggest a child psychologist, but if you have no idea how to access such a health care professional, you should see your family doctor and find out.

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April 9, 20140 found this helpful

Please, please get professional help, for all your sakes before it's too late and don't leave them alone. You say step daughter, did her mother die or walk out on her? Sounds like heartbreak, anger and jealousy and and a three year old doesn't know how to deal with all that.


Try not to blame her (I know that's hard when she's doing these things to her sister). Although she 's the eldest she's not much more than a baby herself, she's too young to understand her actions.
You're at the end of your tether, please get help. God bless you all.

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April 9, 20141 found this helpful

Please don't wait another minute. Your older child will hurt the little one. Get help from your Dr. asap! Do not let them alone for a minute, that's all it will take for permanent damage to be done.

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July 15, 20170 found this helpful

I know this is old now but wanted to see if you were still about to say what happened about all of this. I have same situation with my step son we have 50/50

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