Introducing a Kitten to Resident Cat?

My year old cat Lulu is my baby and is extremely spoiled. She nurses on my ear and will only eat baby food off of my finger that I dip into her bowl to feed to her. She was so focused on me and had so much kitten energy that I mistakenly thought she would benefit from the company of another cat. I am gone 9 hours a day and Lulu is all alone.

She constantly demands my attention and wants me to play with her every minute of the day. There is no doubt this kitty loves me as I do her. I have no children, she is my baby girl. I saw the most adorable little boy kitty at a shelter. He is a 9 1/2 week fixed male only 3.5 lbs.

I introduced them slowly as instructed by all these websites. I showed him to her in the carrier first and she was very curious. She kept sniffing and showed no sign of aggression. I opened the carrier door and they sniffed each other. He immediately went up to extend the olive branch. She hissed and growled at him. I set him up in the bathroom in my bedroom thinking that would be plenty of room for a 10 inch kitten. He started crying. My cat was pacing around growling (I've never seen her act this way). I moved all his belongings, toys, litter pan, and bowls into my spare bedroom and closed the door.

Lulu who always slept with me and would wake up at five every morning to nibble on my ear and fall back asleep with my ear in her mouth purring would not even come near me. She growled and hissed at me when I picked her up. She sat in front of the spare bedroom door all night. She did not eat, use the restroom, or drink until the next day.

When I got home from work I let the kitten (Egg Roll) out of the spare bedroom to walk around and familiarize himself with the place. I put Lulu in my bedroom and closed the door. She ripped up a patch of carpet in front of the bedroom door from having it shut on her. If I have one or the other confined to avoid conflict the other is crying outside the door. If I go in one room to spend time with one, the other is at the doors meowing and trying to get in.

Lulu is chasing Egg Roll around the house and will not leave him alone. If she is not initiating it he will instigate it. I'm dumbfounded as to this strange interaction. She is slapping him as much as 5 times in a row. Egg Roll just throws himself on the floor on his back with his paws up. Over the past two days he has begun to slap her back or jump up and grab her face. I can tell she is super annoyed by this kitten and doesn't even like being around him.

It's only been one week and I feel like I'm not giving Egg Roll a fair shake. He is such a happy kitten and my super sweet girl that I loved is making me so mad and disappointed in her. Her entire demeanor has changed. She cannot play with me because if I try and play with her, he will bulldoze his way in front of her and she just gets mad and walks away. If I feed them at the same time each in different corners same food. He will run right up under her chin to eat her food instead of his. Lulu is not food motivated so she will just leave.

If he hears her in the litter box I have to hold him back or he will run in the restroom to see what she is doing and she will leave without using the restroom. Any chance she gets she will slap him out of annoyance at his presence. Even though he has his own litter pan, he insists on using hers and wants to do everything she is doing. I have had to scold her and splash water at her to get her to stop chasing and smacking him. I don't know if this will ever work out and if I'd have known now what I know I would never have adopted Egg Roll.

I wanted so much for a family, but my cat is being so negative that I'm distraught. How do you know when it is just not going to work? The kitten doesn't cry when she slaps him and he keeps going back for more. I know this is not playing no matter what people tell me. I feel like I messed up my Lulu. Adopting is for life so I don't want to give up on Egg Roll. Can someone please help me? I'm at my wits end. I've cried several times over this decision. I feel like I'm harming my cat.

By Faye