Troubles Between Wife and Mother?

I have been married for about 9 months and we have a new born who was 5 months this 19 September. My wife and my mother do not get along. They fought on our wedding day and a had words a few times after. We live in the same house.


How it started was my wife was making something and my mom came in and said not to do it that way, but this way will make it better. After my wife made a big deal about this, I did tell my mom to please let me know if there is anything wrong and I will try my best to fix it.

So anyways after the wedding, a few weeks later, my mom could see the difference with me and she asked me what was the issue? After hearing that conversation, my wife came down and asked why did you ask (me) that? From there on it was no good. I told my mom that this is not the time for all this knowing that she is pregnant. So my mom said how many people are pregnant right now? This is not different from anyone else.

From that day nothing has been the same in our life. Every week I get to hear about "your family did this to me during my pregnancy and you did not do anything about it". Since then my wife has not been going outside of our room because she does not feel comfortable.

I work full time and I take care of my child when I get home. We have been thru some major fights about my family. She calls me names that no one ever could say to me ever, but I tell myself that it's okay, she just had a baby and she needs some time to get back. When I come home I cook and clean as much as I can, but it seems like she can not see that. I have family at the house that want to see the baby and some times I feel so bad that I can't take my first baby to see her grandma due to what happend.

I really don't know what else to do? I have a work meeting in LA next week and I could take my family with me, but right now I need to make sure all the bills are paid for and I can not buy her the flight tickets. She's giving me hell about, "How are you going to leave me here knowing what I have to go thru?". I told her, "Babe I wish I could, but I can not afford the tickets after paying for everything". Please help. I am trying my best, but it is not enough.


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September 16, 20150 found this helpful

I think you have a different problem than you think you do.

I understand that your wife and mother don't get along. That is not unusual.
But from what I gather here, your wife is not even leaving her room since she had the baby?
This sounds like Postpartum Depression to me.
It is a disorder where the hormones get out of balance. It isn't just depression. A woman may become angry, bad-tempered, and say nobody cares about her or understands her.

If this sounds like your wife, she needs to go to the doctor.

Here is an article that explains more about this condition:

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September 17, 20150 found this helpful

Sad for you all...
You need to move out on your own.
You have your own family now. Your wife shouldn't have to answer to your mom like a child and your mom is going into MOTHERING mode...hard to break, especially in her own home.


I know it's a financial burden to move out but if you don't you may never get the start your new family deserves!
Good Luck!!

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