I've been a very moody person lately and I don't know why. My boyfriend is getting frustrated with me and we have been arguing a lot. We have only been together 9 months, some days are amazing and some are horrible. Am I depressed or bi-polar? What is wrong with me? I've been to my doctor and he said its anxiety, pills don't work though. Please help.
By Sara from Ontario, Canada
I suggest not to take anything, stop seeing this boy. Take long walks, at least a mile every day, eat right, as you might know sweets & fast food is not good for us, good luck.
Try to pinpoint the first time you noticed your mood swing and its cause. This will play a role in the increased frequency of them. Were you ill? Feeling low energy? Upset about something? Something is "rocking" your boat as a ship in troubled sea. Perhaps you're keeping a lot of things bottled up inside and not letting it out. Maybe even your arrangement with boyfriend is a bit much on you if there's other things going on too and that's causing anxiety.
My husband and I have recently learned that I am much more pleasant to be around when I am not using a hormone based birth control method...some were better than others but it seemed that every time I added hormones to my system I got super moody and the IQ of anyone around me dropped 20 points. (Something to consider.)
Thanks for your posts, um first of all, I don't take birth control so its not from that, and kffrmw88 thanks but I am not going to leave my boyfriend. He's the love of my life, I think it just had to do with me being insecure and thinking he didn't want to be with me or didn't find me attractive. Everything is getting better though. If I feel my self getting angry or what not, I just have alone time, relax, listen to music etc, but thanks for everyone's posts.
You'll be fine and all is normal :-) Just take a time out when you feel you can't bite your tongue 'but first' talk to your boyfriend about how you each feel and come to your decisions on how to handle a situation together. Time outs are definitely good but you both need to have an understanding of how those time outs are going to happen. What if he walks away without saying a word, what if you walk away without saying a word?
Simply make sure the rules are understood up front so that there will be no hurt feelings. Pre-agreed code words are good and sometimes just saying them puts a smile on your faces and all is well and a time out ends up not being necessary ;-) I'll never forget having a heated argument with a boyfriend when we were in our early twenties and I said the weirdest thing; I said, "You booger" - LOL! We both just started laughing so hard because of the silliness of the word and argument was gone ;-) You'll both come up with a way together and don't forget that men can get moody too ;-)
It's sounds like you're dealing with insecurity. In order for you to be the best you...you need to be comfortable in your own skin. Things that help: talking to someone about your fears (but not all the time), exercise on a regular basis and putting God in your life. Jesus is the best friend you'll ever have. Be careful of not coming across needy and insecure with your boyfriend though, or it will drive him away.
Trust your doctor and dont listen too much to your boyfriend. Also, I would ask myself if I had this problem before I got him for my boyfriend or only after.
This could be service. Regular physicians know nothing about mood disorders, and write off everything as anxiety. That's how I ended up not knowing I had bipolar disorder. Anxiety pills don't help all mood disorders. There are other kinds of medications which can be used. If your boyfriend is observing that you've changed lately, trust him - people close to you are the ones who notice changes first.
What you need to do is see a psychiatrist (not a psychologist, because they don't deal with medications). There is no shame in seeing a psychiatrist, and he/she can help you get your moods back on track. Nobody online can diagnose you, and neither can your primary-care physician. Please get to a psychiatrist as soon as you can. Take it from one who knows. Help is out there. You just have to reach out for it. Good luck. :-)
I have to agree with unoFranny. The best thing you could ever do is develop and nurture a personal relationship with Jesus. I can't begin to tell you the things He's helped me deal with through the years!
Of course, I also know God put doctors of all types on this earth for a reason, and I really hope you have access to a good one. Talking things out with a counselor - whether it's a secular or religious counselor - can be invaluable. A psychiatrist might be even better, though. Then you'd have the benefit of counseling plus the added benefit that a psychiatrist is also an MD. If you are bipolar and need prescription meds, a psychiatrist can prescribe the best ones for you.
don't know if this would work for you, but there are two herbal remedies that helped me without impairing my thought processes: St John's Wort and Valerian Root. You can get both over the counter. Talk to your doctor (whichever kind you choose) about these, though, as they may interact with prescription meds.
God bless you, I'll keep you in my prayers.
Of course, talking things out can help a lot, too. If you can find a reputable counselor or psychiatrist, they're thoroughly trained to understand what's going on; the psychiatrist would no doubt be better, because he or she is also an MD and can prescribe whatever meds are necessary as well as helping you talk out your issues.
Lots of boyfriends and girlfriends separate after 9 months. When you have been seeing someone for 9 months you reach a point where you have to both decide whether this is going to become a long term relationship or not. Could this have something to do with what is bothering you?
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