Asking Mom to Shave and Buy a Bra

My mom and I don't have a really good relationship because she always works long hours and I don't really get a chance to talk to her. I'm 13 and in 8th grade. Basically everyone in my class is shaving and wears a bra (at least a sports bra), but I don't know how to ask her.

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My legs are really hairy and I have a lot of armpit hair. My mom has brought it up a couple of times when I have casually said that I have lots of leg hair, but she just ignores it. Once though, she said that she didn't start shaving until she was in college. I can't wait until college! I really want to shave now. Even my dad and brother have brought it up to me how my legs look like boys' legs with all that hair.

Two years ago, we were shopping and I was buying a tank top with her and I told her how I didn't know if I wanted it because I had so much armpit hair. She told me I could shave it off, but she has never really gone back onto the topic. I have worn dresses before and I have purposely raised my arms to flash her my armpit hair to see if she would notice. I think she did, but she just never really brings it up.

On the topic of bras, currently, I am only wearing camis with like the training bras attached to them in the inside, but my mom won't upgrade me into an actual training bra. I just don't know how to bring it up. She doesn't wear sports bras and she doesn't own them either so I have a feeling she doesn't really know what they are or just never used them. All of my friends wear them and I really want one and I think I am ready for one.

How should I approach her about these? Lots of people say to just confront her, but when the time comes close, I just back out.

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June 1, 20160 found this helpful

Tell her you need to talk to her about something important and have her set a time when she won't be working, like an appointment. then you can't just back out.

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June 1, 20160 found this helpful

If making a time to talk with her is not possible, you can consider writing a note to her describing your specific concerns. Ask for her help to start shaving and going to a store for a bra-fitting.

Good Luck!!!

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June 2, 20160 found this helpful

And if your mother doesn't come through (it happens), ask your best friend's mom? Or an aunt?

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June 2, 20160 found this helpful

How's your relationship with your dad? Maybe you could ask him? Or maybe Mom is more comfortable with it than you expect she'll be. Just ask. As a mom myself, I left stuff like that up to my son, knowing that when he was ready, he'd ask.

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I agree with the other person that answered who said maybe you could leave her a note. Be strong, sweetie. Let her know how embarrassed you are because other girls your age are already shaving and wearing bras. I guarantee you she doesn't want you to feel bad about yourself. Hang in there!

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June 15, 20160 found this helpful

Just talk to her alone or without any distractions tell her you need a bra you need to shave. I am scared to tell my mom I need to shave and I am not even a teen. I don't reply know about the bra I was in 2nd grade and she told me.

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