Here are the questions asked by community members. Read on to see the answers provided by the ThriftyFun community.
My dad is in a nursing home and his attorney in fact died. My dad's brother is now conviced that he can be in charge of my dad's money and get power of attorney. He is 70 years old has been schizophrenic since childhood and has also filled for bankruptcy in the past.
You should immediately discuss your concerns with an attorney experienced in POA and elder law.
My friend got arrested and they won't give his monthly trust to him. He gave me his POA. What can I do? She won't acknowledge me.
By Cindy C.
If I get this right: friend arrested, who gets monthly money from trust fund; your friend has made you his/her Power of Attorney; "she" won't acknowledge you. First, who is "she"? Second, the procedure for giving someone Power of Attorney to take care of another's affairs, including trust fund money, will never be recognized just because Person A says that I want Person B (you) to be my POA.
My dad has power of attorney of his father. He has had it for four years. When it was given he was it in sound mind. Now my dad's father has Alzheimer's. A family friend is trying to revoke my dads POA. My dad has done nothing wrong. How hard is it to revoke a POA and how do you contest it.
By Lou
I am hardly an attorney - but it would seem that this circumstance - your father's father becoming less competent is the precise reason powers of attorney are given - no? I would think that if the man in question has been deemed to have Alzheimers, he would be unable to change a power of attorney without legal motions - I recommend the Nolo Press series of self-help books for research (They also have a website).
This is the precise reason one gives the power of attorney over to another. Contact an attorney--consultations are usually free. You grandfather was in sound mind when he made his choice, and he wanted your father to be in charge of his decisions.
The only reason I think the court would consider revoking someone's wishes of POA, is if that person had done something dubious, illegal, or had a history of really bad decisions - especially ones made after POA had been given. This sounds like someone is jealous and wants to be in charge, not a good reason for a judge to change a legal decision.
If your grandfather still has lucid moments, ask him if he wants your father (or the other person) to be in charge still, and tape it - or better yet, have another, unrelated person witness him stating it.
If the friend can prove you father has misused the POA by taking money for his own use and not spending it for your grandfather then it can be revoked and the court would take over as POA. All POA ends with the person's death and the admistrator of the estate takes over.
I agree with what Lilac said above, unless the other person can prove your dad is taking advantage of the situation to the courts then nothing can be changed unless your grandfather is of sound mind then he can change it himself.. The courts would take it over if it can be proven so not to worry your grand dad's wishes will still be met.
When it comes to family and money you will be surprised how they come out of the wood work to try and take control over it, that's where the law protects us and makes it right for our last wishes..
Yes, definitely seek advice of a lawyer asap, actually two or three, and make sure they give a free consultation when booking the appointments. You should also have a written list of questions ready to ask.
Can I give my sister a durable power of attorney to act on my behalf to ensure my safety in physical, emotional, and mental situations?
I am a Georgia resident. I am the oldest of 3 girls. Mother has had a hospital emergency. I, the big sister, was the only one that called 911, took her to the hospital, stayed, and then checked her in to find out what was wrong. The youngest sister has power of attorney. The hospital says even though I brought her to ER the sister with POA can only be spoken with unless the sister w/POA gives me permission to handle things at the hospital.
Is that true? Neither of the 2 younger sisters even came to hopsital at all, the ER day, to assist me in any way. There is something wrong here yes? Would like some guidance.My mother fell and broke her hip. She gave me power of attorney over her. She has a grandson staying in her home. He doesn't pay rent he just stays there, he has no job, and depends on my mother for money.
How do we go about getting him out of the home?I was appointed my grandparents' POA 10 years ago. My grandmother passed on 7 years ago. They have no living children. My sister and I are the only grandchildren from their only son who passed on 10 years ago. Granddad has been falling and has broken ribs. Doctors are evaluating him in a rehab facility. He is 89 years old with no terminal illness at this time, but continues to get weaker and not able to live alone. We are hoping the therapy will help so he can go home with home care help.
My grandmother always handled all the finances and my grandfather has never dealt with it. I picked up my grandmother's responsibility of the finances to help granddad when she past on. I have a 23 year old nephew that lives with granddad, but is no help for the care he needs. My nephew guilts granddad into paying his bills and constantly giving him money. I can't balance the accounts because of the extra money my granddad hands over to the nephew all the time.
We know home care is going to be expensive and need all the funds so granddad gets what he needs. I have talked to him about this so many times and he said my grandmother's dying wish was for him to take of and not let anyone run over the nephew. I am mentally exhausted and don't know what else to do. Any suggestions are greatly appreciated.
My husband's mother has dementia, but her doctor says it is not bad enough that she can't make her own decisions. We live in another state and my husband's aunt has been taking care of his mother. She disagrees with the doctor and thinks that mother needs to be in a nursing home. My husband agrees. Does the power of attorney give him the right to put her in the nursing home without her wanting that?
They have tried to have Meals on Wheels come and also visiting nurses to help her out, but she is refusing all help. She is 84 and forgets everything. She will have a conversation with you and repeat the same thing 3 times within 5 minutes. She really can't take care of herself and the aunt is not able to continue helping her.By Lisa M
This situation is a bit complicated but not uncommon. Your husband needs legal counsel in the issue. I strongly suggest your husband discuss this situation with an attorney who specializes in POAs. Some questions-how is the POA worded? Is your husband's aunt his mother's sister? Does she receive money or other payment for taking care of his mother? Your husband may need an independent medical evaluation to clarify his mother's condition. Good Luck!
My husband's grandfather made a will and left us his house in his will. His daughter's husband is the POA and they want to sell the house to pay for assisted living even thought he has money without selling the house. What are my husband's rights as far as inheriting the house?
By A
You will need to consult a lawyer, but it seems straight forward that
the house was left to you. She has no right to it at all. If, however the state wanted to, it might place a lien against it prior to you receiving it.
Yes, get a lawyer now or you will soon find yourselves without the house!
You really need an attorney ASAP as once things are done it is very difficult to "undo".
What type of POA does the son-in-law have?
If the POA includes financial affairs then he has a lot of power as a will may not be valid until the death of the person.
Why was the son-in-law given the POA?
Moving into assisted living usually requires a full accounting of all assets so naturally, an institution would wish to have cash before other assets but they may not allow a home to be sold unless there is a large "cash" flow as assisted living usually means some type of care and "expected" care.
Institutions of this sort usually go "back" 5 years to see if anyone disposed of assets in anticipation of putting someone in a "home".
You should seek legal help as there is probably a lot you do not know about this whole situation.
But - think about this also - how does your husband feel about fighting this? This sort of thing may tear a family apart and change things forever.
I just recently received POA for my grandmother who has Alzheimer's. Can I still go on vacation? I've been planning this trip for awhile. I would be gone for a week.
By Cathy
You could see if she could go into a care facility on a respite.
The Power of Attorney enables you to look after her financial affairs. You don't have to be on hand every second to do that. Of course, you can go on vacation.
You do not say where your grandmother is living so it would be difficult for someone to really answer this question.
Does she live with you?
Who takes care of her on a daily basis?
Does she ever stay alone/by herself at the present time?
Will she be safe if you go away for a week?
If you have a daily responsibility is there someone to take over while you are gone?
Or is there somewhere she can stay while you are away?
Only you can answer these kind of questions.
I would just like to add this comment:
Why do you feel you were given the POA?
What type of POA do you have?
Does this POA give you full responsibility over your grandmothers health decisions and financial decisions?
What do you feel your responsibilities are?
True - A POA can be just for financial things but most POA's are for health care decisions. POA's are only legal until that person dies so think about all of this and then make your decision.about taking a vacation.
I hope you are able to a take vacation knowing that your grandmother is well cared for in your absence.
If my brother has a power of attorney and in the will it said our parents house has to be sold, do all siblings need to agree on selling price or can the person with the POA sell it for whatever price he wants?
By Jennie from Victoria, BC
I don't know about the legalities of it; but am struck by the dilemma your family is facing. Before you say anything to the brother with POA or your other siblings, bear in mind that families can fracture over such situations. You will need to decide if a few thousand dollars (or less, split many ways) is worth losing family relations over. Sometimes, once the glue that held the family together (your parents) is gone, it is far too easy to lose the relationship with siblings. I don't mean to sound preachy; but just wanted to throw a reminder your way, during a tough time. Good luck to you all.
I hope you read this. POA ENDS with the person's death. The administrator takes over and the will is probated. If your brother is also the administrator you may live in a state that requires a lawyer to assist him. If so, the lawyer will see that the will is carried out correctly. The courts must approve the administrator when the will is probated.
Did you mean POA or did you mean your brother is executor of the will? It makes a difference to your question.
I think you should also heed Jilson's points. This is the sort of situation that could possibly create hard feelings for years. My ex's family has drifted apart over the years since his mom passed away and small resentments simmer under the surface that prevent them from being as close as they should be.
My husband is in jail and his mother passed. She left him her power of attorney and he is her only child. Is the responsibility on me as his wife to make sure everything is taken care of?
While my elder sister has never been a real sister to me since I was very young, she has not stopped short of being really mean spirited to me for years in any capacity that she could.
She holds POA for my mom; both live in Florida. My mom divorced my father and moved to Florida about 18 years ago when she retired at the age of 70. I live in Connecticut. Since my mom moved to an assisted living facility 4 years ago, my sister has done everything possible to interfere with my ability to communicate with my mom.
Examples: 1) when my mother changed rooms within the facility and was assigned a new phone number at the facility, my sister not only refused to share that information with me, but actually blocked me from getting it from the assisted living facility. I called the police and they said I have to hire an attorney. 2) When my mother fell and broke her hip bone and the artificial hip she had, the day after my mom's surgery, she went off on a cruise, leaving my mother alone. After 2 to 3 weeks of recovery Mom was transported to a therapy center to recover, my sister refused to tell me where she was sent after repeated requests and my mother telling her to communicate that to me. I had to call all the facilities in the area for 3 days to find my own mother. 3) I now have learned from my younger sister that my elder sister (POA) has not started taking my mail that I send to my mother and has not given it to her. I do not know if she will. The mail is letters to my mom from her mom over 60 years ago, which my mother has been waiting for now for 2 weeks. She has nothing like that from her mom.
While I understand she (POA) does not need to communicate things about my mother, she has successfully blocked my ability to get any information about my mom's health, send her mail, and get information if she moves to a hospital or even if her phone number changes. I can only imagine that she will now change my mom's telephone number so I cannot have access to speak with her anymore. When I visited my mom a few months ago, we tried to add my name to the assisted living facility roster so I can get even updated contact information about my mom, and even my mom has been blocked from changing this because a few years ago she was diagnosed with Alzheimer's Disease.
Please help if there are any other options without going through a very costly court battle which I cannot afford. My mom is 89 this year and is not well. She may not have another year left.
Thank you so much!
My brother, who was incarcerated, asked me to be his POA. He is now out on parole and is still asking me to do things on his behalf. As POA am I a target if anything goes wrong?
For example, bad business dealings on his part. I am helping him somewhat financially and do not want to be part of any bad dealings.My mother died 9 months ago, she was in a car accident had a few strokes, had diabetes and was bed ridden for 4 years. In the mean time, my sister obtained power of attorney and moved money around and even destroyed a will that was in a drop box at a local bank. My sister took $67,000.00 and bought a forclosure home right out in Arizona, she put the house in her daughter's name and grandkids names. She also moved money from one bank to another and out to a bank to Arizona which has my sister's daughter's name on it, the amount we are talking about is 1 million dollars.
My sister made a will but my mom refused to sign it and my sister's lawyer refuses to send copy. Is their any thing I can do about any of this since she did buy a house with our moms money while my mom was still alive and then took both properties and all the money that my mom had already had divided out?My sister went to her attorney and got a POA on our mother and she never discussed with me. The only way I found out was that she let it slip out of her mouth. I was shocked, I was really hurt by this. I know my mom has Alzheimer's, but I asked my mom did she sign any papers and she yes, but she didn't know what she signed.
I just don't know why my sister did this. It is only the two of us and I am the oldest. What can I do about this?My husband is in jail and needs a criminal defense attorney. The property is only in his name and he wants me to try to sell it. He wants to give me POA so I can try to sell it.
How would I go about doing this?
My mother-in-law got a POA for her brother after he was hit by a car. He gets a disability check every month. When he got out of the hospital, he moved in with my mother-in-law and father-in-law. After 3 months they had to put him in a nursing home, because he was getting violent. Now that he is in a nursing home his insurance pays for his stay, so his disability check will still be coming in each month.
My father-in-law strongly belives that they are able to spend his money just because he can't. I told him it doesn't matter if he can't spend it, it doesn't give you the right to spend it either. That my mother-in-law can spend it on things he needs and that's it.I have a medical POA for my father. Can my family come into my home and take my father and put him in a home when I disagree?
By Anna
Strongly suggest you immediately consult with an attorney to understand your responsibilities as POA and what your family legally can and can not do.
I have taken care of my mother's finances since my dad passed away 21 years ago. Only recently I became POA for her finances. I gave up the POA to my sister after we fought. I was told that I have to account for all checks made out to me (they were for her meds and living expenses that I paid for and then got reinbursed for). Do I need to go back 21 years or just as far as when I became financial POA?
By Marie
You were told that - who told you? Was it your sister? Find out who is actually requiring this and ask them. If it's just your sister, ignore her. She's been enough trouble already.
My friend's daughter has the POA for her. However, the daughter just recently went to the bank where the account was and moved the money out of my friend's account and started a new account in her name. Is that legal? First off, my friend had no knowledge until it was too late. My friend had already spoken to multiple employees of the bank days prior to this incident, attempting to get her money secured for the time being while she was in the process of getting her daughter removed as her POA. Well, after multiple employees told her how to secure her money, that next day her daughter was still able to walk in there withdraw the money and start a new account in the daughter's name.
How is this possible? The daughter doesn't think what she's doing is a crime, because she is more or less trying to say that it's her money. I also noticed on one of your answers it says that a POA is supposed to use the money entirely on the person they are acting for. Well, from my understanding, the daughter has already spent a good majority of the money on her personal bills such as rent, etc. Altogether she probably has spent a little over 20 grand on all of these personal matters. Anyways, this is illegal right?By Lacey
Your friend should immediately talk to an attorney who specializes in POAs about the specific language of your friend's POA, the daughter's activity and what your friend can do now.
My husband is incarcerated and he has at least 6 homes that his dad has been taking care of, a system that has been working. Now his dad brought POA papers to my husband requesting he sign them, he didn't. My husband wrote a simple letter giving him power as overseer of the property, that's it! He had it notarized. Well his dad is really pushing this POA and I'm starting to question his motives. My question is why isn't the letter enough; why keep pushing for POA?
By Kelly R
Why are you not chosen as the POW? Is your name on any deeds? Are these properties that your husband obtained before your marriage? Why do you not speak to Dad about why he wants POW? If you're married, you should be included with decisions I would think. Something doesn't sound right here from info provided. There's two sides to this.
I am my father's POA, he has been drinking to 300+ blood alcohol levels and as he begins to sober he starts again. Can I commit him?
By JM from Des Moines, IA
That sounds a little harsh to just commit him. Could you not try to get him to an AA meeting or talk about rehabilitation first? If you love your father I am sure you wouldn't want him going into an institution where it might be too traumatic for him to cope with. He may deteriorate very quickly if you just abandon him like that.
Think about different options first. Seek advise from AA. There is a specific community set up to help loved ones of alcoholics.
Emotions and familial duty aside, your father is continuing to drink and is a hazard to himself and all other people if he drives, uses kitchen and other appliances, etc., while intoxicated. I suggest you immediately discuss the possible legal ramifications of commiting or not commiting him as you are the POA.
Is there supervision of the person to whom I give a POA to transfer my money, which is in the bank, to me? So he might not keep the money himself?
By M H.
Everyone should be very, very careful who they give a POA to as once it is done, it is very difficult to "undo".
There is more than one "type" of POA and is best handled through an attorney. Even giving a full control POA to one of your children may not always be a good idea.
A POA (just has to be notarized) that gives full power does not have anyone to oversee what they do with your money, property, even your own personal things can be in jeopardy. So - please - use only an attorney that has to be notified when the POA is used. A POA can be a dangerous thing - or - a good thing so be very careful.
It is according to the type of POA you signed. IF it IS a regular POA you may have prob.'s with it being accepted if selling a house/property trans. from banks, etc. They will NOT accept a regular POA! If you have a durable POA you have complete control.
Do not give anyone a durable durable POA! If the person decides to cancel their POA of any kind, they can do so by signing papers @ the courthouse to cancel the POA & the person you gave the POA to, can no longer do anything in your name!
I certainly agree with Maw-Maw about not giving a durable power of attorney to just anyone but sometimes it becomes necessary - but - as I said it should be done through an attorney who will have final say. The POA would have the attorney's name AND (not or) another person approved by the one giving the POA.
That way any time anyone tries to use the POA, at least that would give some security with a second person approving what is trying to be done. This is not difficult but it will cost money each time the attorney has to review the POA. This can get expensive so it is best to not give a durable POA and leave all requests in a properly executed will or trust.
But - you can give a standard or durable POA with an ending date - even for just a day - so sometimes this may be the way to go.
A durable Power of Attorney can be revoked by filing with the court but few people go to the trouble to do this. Some people even forget that they gave a POA years in the past - but - without an ending date, the POA is good until that persons death.
Anyone senior dealing with a POA should try to have legal assistance even if it only with a senor citizens association. If the person is unable to visit their office, they will send someone to their house - at least they do in my area (Florida).
What do I do to make sure I'm the person over my mom's disability check? My granny was the person who was over it, but she died. But my mom's family is trying to take it and she wants me over it as I am her daughter. The family said I can't do it because I'm a felon.
Please help.
My fiancé is in prison for 8 more years; he wants to marry me and he has a trust fund from his deceased father. He has not signed any papers with the trust/probate attorney because of his incarceration.
What rights would I have if I am his fiance or if I marry him? He wants to release the POA into my hands instead of leaving in his brother's hands. Do I have any rights?
