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Cornelius has left the building...

On Friday, January 8th at about 5:10 pm, Cornelius took his leave. He was very sick and not having any fun, so I chose to think about him rather than keep him with me, I wanted to more than you know.
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Who knew that cats and dogs could get human diseases? He had epilepsy and diabetes. They didn't leave him alone and the cure was more than I had. So watching him go from a big old' boy to 7 lbs. was more than I could bear.

It was scheduled for Tuesday at 5pm, but I found a clinic that was 1/3 the cost so I had a reprieve of a little over 3 days from one appointment to the last one, so I got to spend some quiet time with him. On Friday, the clinic had a nice room where we were alone for about 30 minutes.

We snuggled on the couch and then he was sedated. He was my little stoned buddy for about 15 minutes. When she came in for the end, I made sure from her that he could not see me or hear me leave, then said "I love you buddy" and chose to leave him in her care for the final shot. They were lovely ladies and I get him back today. I have a pretty tin with spring flowers on it all ready, and I am going to keep some of him in a small little bottle.

I know he wasn't a person so there is no comparison. But, I have not yet cried. The dam will no doubt break at some point, but I keep stoic so I can take care of business and reflect on why he had to leave so soon. I donated all his things to the folks in my park. I made this frame and am posting some of his last photos. Some are sad as he was very weak and ready to go.

He gave me 5 years of the best CatPanionship there was. He was always ready to curl up for a great photo op, got in my way when I needed to work, head booped me to mark me as his own, and was the best snuggle buddy at night. No matter how bad a day was, it ended with his chin on my hand.

But, soon he will move into that wonderful place where Cujo and Buddy, Quill and Kizzy, Salsha and Judy, Sabastian and Boo Boo, and all the critters I have loved and shared and said goodbye to reside. He will have great company.

But, for now he will also be my last. Many believe I should never let the loss outweigh the love. And they are probably right.

I just know that I will keep that funny face as a reminder that I could never find another like him so I am not going to try.

Sandi/PBP

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January 12, 20160 found this helpful

What a cutie! So sorry for you loss!

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January 12, 20160 found this helpful

Sandi, I know how you feel. It really hurts when you lose your pet. Your posting brought tears to my eyes.

As you know, it takes a while but you will move on and get another pet that you will love just as much.

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Anonymous
January 13, 20160 found this helpful

Sandy so sorry for your loss, I have been in the same place you have and it is so hard , as time goes buy it will get easier! I swore I would never have another dog after my precious Rollo pasted with cancer at the young age of 5 but after a little time went by I thought a lot about all the dogs and cats that needed a loving home and if I could help another dog have a life full

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January 13, 20160 found this helpful

Sandi I am so sorry. Cornelius looks just like my best buddy Timmy. Know that we are thinking of you. You did the right thing.

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I takes awhile for it all to come into focus. Our connections to our animals is so strong and satisfying. They have the sweetest souls. Take some time to heal. Hugs to you...

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January 14, 20160 found this helpful

Sandi, I feel your loss as I, too, have had to say goodbye to many much loved fur babies. I know you feel he's your last but I think of something I read long ago..."A heart big enough to love a cat (dog) is big enough to love another one."
Cherish your memories and before you know it, you just might be making new ones. I care.

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January 14, 20160 found this helpful

Deepest heartfelt condolences at your loss, Sandi. I believe in The Rainbow Bridge - and they'll ALL be there to greet you one day.

(((HUGS))) to you.

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January 14, 20160 found this helpful

Thanks ladies. I will be kind to myself and continue to donate my time and supplies to help other kitties and puppies thrive even if mine could not.

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This helps both them and me. Paying his love forward is the only thing I can do to honor him. It helps that I have so many people on TF that care.

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January 14, 20160 found this helpful

So sorry for your loss, what a special kitty.

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February 11, 20160 found this helpful

Very sorry for your loss. Your kitty would not want you to be unhappy so let your tears come, they will heal you.

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May 16, 20160 found this helpful

So sorry for your loss. I've been thru this many times, like you. But still Cornelius brought tears to my eyes.

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