I have three cats. The first being the biggest and the third still a kitten. The kitten is not the problem here, he gets along with everyone. The oldest cat lives in EXTREME fear of the middle cat, and pees everywhere because of it and cries all the time. The middle cat is aggressive with him and always looking to attack him when possible. I'm not sure what to do about this. My oldest cat barely comes out of the closet because he feel safe in there. How do I get the middle cat to stop attacking? How can I train him that it is wrong?
My sister has a similar problem and has been trying a product called Feliway. It's a behavior modification system, available at pet stores (but is cheaper thru the Drs Foster & Smith website or catalog). You can plug the system into the wall, or spray a particular spot if that's the case, and it supposedly emits the positive pheromones that cats naturally emit. The idea is that it creates a space that cats would not want to soil, because it has a positive "scent" (you can't smell it, but somehow it relaxes the cat). My two cats do the "attack" thing, but usually the calico is "attacking" the black cat when she enters the room.
I have 4 cats, 2 exhibiting the same behavior as yours. We got them all at the same time, the oldest, a boy, who is also the largest is not the agressor. Our girl cat, 3 years younger and also large, will go up and smack him across the face every time she shes him, which is all day, everyday. He just sits there and cries. If I see her do it, I gently pop her on the nose and make her go into another room.
A few ideas that I've used with my 5 indoor cats; hope something helps!
Make sure you have plenty of litter boxes in different areas. Same with food and water. It helps if cats can avoid each other for these necessities.
When you catch one cat being aggressive, try to startle it with loud noises, coins in a coffee can, etc. A quick squirt with water in a spray bottle on the aggressor can help too.
Make several "perches" available. My oldest likes to curl up in shoeboxes, so I have several in high and low spots. I have a few 3 story kitty condos in desirable window spaces. Each has their favorite spot, but when one is displaced by another, they can find another place to hang out.
Give each kitty attention when there is no conflict. Don't reward bad behavior with your attention.
Throughly clean up accidents - I use enzyme digesters, and they really work. I had to wrap couch cushions in plastic for awhile until the smell was completely gone, but so far, so good - no more peeing.
Finally, you may just have to separate your cats. I have a feral cat I took in after she was mauled by a dog. She is extremely timid, and the other cats trapped and tormented her. So she has her own room. Kitty 5 was a young kitten abandoned by her mother, now she lives happily with the feral kitty in a spare bedroom. My friends think I am nuts, but what the heck - I use the room for storage anyway, with everything in plastic stacking bins with lids.
Good luck!
Please don't thump kitty in the nose, especially when she is already worked up, you may end up getting bit when she learns that hands aren't always nice. Squirt bottles only work when you are right there, they don't teach the cat not to be aggressive, just not to do it when you are there.
You don't say if all of the cats are spayed/neutered and how long they have lived together or if the problem has always existed between these two cats. The first thing to do is a trip to the vet to make sure that the oldest cat is healthy. What you see as fear of the other cat may be discomfort from any number of conditions. Cats are very good at hiding pain, and the other cat may sense that your oldest is unwell. If the cat is healthy and everyone is spayed/neutered, then you have to think if the problem has always existed. If these two cats have never gotten along, then it may be simply a personality conflict; just like people, animals don't always like everyone that they meet. If the conflict is something new, when did it start? Did the older cat go to the vet and therefore smell different when he came home? Did it start when the new kitten came home, changing the dynamic? Sometimes one event can cause a friendship to crumble. If there was a frienship, it can be rebuilt. If they have lived together a long time and never gotten along, you may need to separate them or possibly find one a new home. If they have only been together a short time, you can help them build a positive relationship.
1. Baths work well. Each cat will smell like the other and will be more worried about getting dry than the other cat. They may even move to mutual grooming.
2. A dab of canned food on top of each cat's head may distract enough to encourage mutual grooming.
3. In extreme cases, you may need to start with each cat in a different room. After a few days, switch rooms. Then a few days later, one cat roams the house while the other stays in the room. A few more days and switch again. Once the anxiety has been reduced a little in this fashion, each cats gets placed in a plastic carrier on opposite sides of the room, facing each other. Place a blanket and some of their favorite canned food in there with them and leave them for 15 to 30 minutes, then put them back in their rooms (note: this works best if you have trained your cat to enjoy the carrier and they are both hungry). Next day, move the carriers closer. Don't try to rush any of these steps, if the older cat gets anxious, move back to where he felt safe (even back to both cats in separate rooms). When the carriers can be placed face to face and touching without any fear or aggression, start again on opposite sides of the room, feeding the cats their special treats outside of the carrier. Each day, move a little closer, then put them back in their own rooms. Eventually they may eat from the same plate. This training may take months, be patient if you are committed to keeping them both and keeping them happy.
4. Plenty of play and interaction for both cats, alone and when the other is in the room. Try not to show any favoritism, but let them know they are loved.
5. Plenty of litter boxes (three cats should have at least four litter boxes) and one litter box on each level of the house. Plenty of hiding places and window perches.
Good luck. Feel free to contact me if this isn't totally clear.
Time to get out the old squirt bottle or squirt gun & squirt the agressor.Also say NO!!! very loudly when you do this . This is pretty natural behavior in the wild & is rather like the old Western Movies where the younger gunfighter shows up to challenge the old Fastest gun .
Whenever he or she attacks the other cat make sure you are always moving the cat who is being aggresive, never move the other cat if they didn't do anything wrong. And when he attacks try putting in a place he doesn't like , like a carrier and leave him in there no food or water for about an hour to 45 minutes everytime he does that, that shoudl teach him. Oh and when you let himout don't prasie him at all. IT WORKS!!
I just moved in with my in-laws they have a cat they have raised since it was first born they bottle fed it .Its a black cat. I have a Himalayan that I rescued a yr ago she is between5-7 yrs.old .I have had her to the vet she is fixed.However the black cat is not.My inlaws cat is extremely aggressive towards her the ripp each others fur out its terrible. its been three weeks and they still dont get along. what should I do?(
I live on a farm. Have had this cat with me for about 1 year then one day this strange cat came to my farm and she has stayed ever since but the strange cat is now a barn cat and the other cat is a house cat well the house cat is spayed the barn cat is not. The house cat will go up to the barn and attack the barn cat. So I will take the house cat back up to the house and she will find a way out and go up to the barn again
Can any one help?
For Barn v. House = My mother had a house cat that did that....he was old and fixed. He "ruled" the house, regardless of who lived outside. Male cats are extremely territorial, regardless of being fixed. I would do my best to keep them separated and look into Leukemia testing...they tend to catch it from other cats.
A few days ago, we got a new cat to the house hold. He's male and fixed and about 18 months old. We already have a female cat that we've had for just over a year, and have been living in this home for 8 months. So she has taken this whole house as her territory. She has stayed with my parents who also have cats for a few weeks and how she acted when she stayed there was totally different then with the new cat in the house. When she was in unfamiliar territory with strange cats, she hid alot in my Mom's bed. Though that's where the other cats would sleep. The other two cats were never hostile with her, but she always ran hissing and growling, though never attacking. She does the same when my parents bring their poodle over here when they come visit. The poodle doesn't want to attack, but is rather curious about her (because she plays with 2 cats at home all the time), and my kitty will cry and run away if she's around and hide under my bed. Now with the new cat, the moment he stepped foot in the house, she would go up to him, sniff, howl and hiss. He doesn't much care unless she gets too close with her hissing and he'll start growling and eventually chase her upstairs, under my bed. The female tends to have her safe spot in my bedroom while the male cat has seem to have taken over the living room. The living area is where the cat food and water is and there is one litter box in the basement. When the female cat comes into the room, he will follow her and try to get close to her until she gets too angry and runs away (or we seperate them). I will look into getting the Feliway that many people have mentioned, but seperating them isn't easy. The bathrooms are small and all the other spare rooms are bedrooms (people sleep in them) so it's hard to find a sanitary spot for another litter box. I can easily bring another dish of food and water into my bedroom for the female cat though. Is there any more tips that people can share? I just find it so much easier to train them when they are kittens, but these two are both the same age.
I have two cats: a female about 7, & a 3 year male. Taffy is very aggressive but she finally accepted Coco after a few weeks.. He was about 7 weeks when we got him. Now, Taffy is starting to attack Coco for no reason at all!! Just started to chase him around the house, & spit & snarl.. I thought she was going to kill him!! We separated them but my husband is fed up with the situation & says he's gonna throw Taffy out in the cold if she can't behave... what do I do? Poor Coco is afraid to move. He's in my computer room right now, & Taffy is under our bed, but she comes up to the door & lets out sounds like she is possessed... I don't know what set her off. I don't want to lose either one of my babies, especially to injury or death...
I have 3 cats the oldest is 6yrs old the middle is 2yrs old and the youngest is still a kitten the loves being around the other cats but the oldest hates them both and the middle one just hates the youngest only and soon the youngest is gonna have to become an outside cat along with the other two and I don't know how to make them get along! Someone PLEASE help me!
I have 2 older (12 year old black short hairs). They are "twin" brother and sister. I moved in with my girlfriend who already had a 6 year old male. We bought 2 kittens together. They are a 17 week male toyger, and a 9 month old male toyger.
So that's 4 males and 1 female.
Black male (12 years old)
Black female (12 years old)
Grey male (6 years old)
Orange male Toyger (9 months old)
Orange male Toyger (17 weeks old)
All 5 cats are spayed/neutered
The female cat does not really like any other cat or animal, except for her brother from the same litter. She tolerates the 6 year old male, and doesn't care for the kittens, but she also doesn't care if they are around. She is not afraid of them, and only hisses when they bother her. She is in affected by the new kittens as far as where she lays.
The 6 year old grey male is very skittish ever since a dog bit his tail off. He was very afraid of the Toygers at first, but has since befriended the youngest kitten and is starting to warm up to the older kitten.
The 2 kittens are not afraid of any cat or anyone. They are very pleasant, and playful as well, as very forward and outgoing. This makes them very "pushy" when it comes to the other cats personal space to some extent. But they are kittens and that's just how they are I suppose. I do find it strange that even when the older cats are hissing and being very threatening, both Toygers could care less. They don't flinch or show any sign of being afraid or alarmed. They are so calm, at times they will stop and literally yawn while the other cat swings and hisses.
I have also never seen either Toyger act aggressively towards any of the other cats or each other. They are aggressive in what looks like playing to me. Could the Toygers be purposely aggressive, even though they don't look like it?
Because what I don't understand is my oldest male cat (12 years old), absolutely hates the 9 month old Toyger. And its him specificaly. he has no problem with the 17 week old. And he is the friendliest cat of the bunch. He has never shown aggression towards any person, cat or animal in his whole life. And has never been afraid either. Super confident, and easily the largest cat of the 5.
So why does he hate the Toyger? He stays away from everyone because of it, and lays upstairs. He normally never does that. And when the Toyger runs up to him to play, he almost looks afraid...which doesn't make sense to me since he is much larger. What going on here? How can I get them to be friends?
The Toyger has a little Bengal in it, could that be omething the other cats smell, and are alarmed by? Is the Toyger being secretly aggressive towards my older cat, even though it looks like harmless playfulness?
My boy cat got fixed and my girl cat is not and always attacks him what do I do?
Here are the questions asked by community members. Read on to see the answers provided by the ThriftyFun community.
I have two cats. A male 1 1/2 and a female 3 1/2. they don't physically fight - they seem like they just play, but they never groom each other, they never lie near each other. Whenever I play with the male, the female will come from whatever room she's in - and he always runs away. I spend as a result more time with her. He was my first cat.
He was about 8 months when I got her and she was about 2. Is there anyway to make them get along better? They are spade and neutered and both healthy. They are rarely by themselves as I work from home. I would like to be able to play with the two of them together without feeling that I am neglecting the one. Can you please help?Sabrina, that could have been almost my own story, so similar was my experience. I think you have to accept that for some cats 'tolerating' is the best they can do. I had for one year, a very fiesty grey female cat.. then came along a lovely ginger male (a stray) now they've both have been here with me for six years. She has never bonded with him. She doesn't hiss or attack him, but they never groom each other, sleep together, or so on. they just travel their own paths. Although I would like to see them cuddled up together, it's not going to happen and it's their choice.
I have six cats. My solution to any problem with cats is the same, because it always works: Grooming, grooming, and more grooming. Have combs and brushes in every room, that you can reach for. This is such immense pleasure for the cats that it overcomes any other desires. It is SO healthy and bonding for them. My solution is grooming as much as you can and more. Let others who are in your household do the same. The cats will be much happier and healthier.
Another thought: Since we are a 6-cat household, and they span different ages/sexes, we have had to put in another litter box. Cats don't have the same preferences for litter, and a crabby constipated cat won't get along as easily with others as a "regular" cat.
I have two neutered male cats who have been living together in my house for over 3 years. Before the second one moved in, it belonged to my neighbor, so they cats have 'known' each other for several years, but have only been house-mates for 3 years. They have never gotten along...my big male has always picked on the younger one, even when the younger one lived at my neighbor's house. It has been a slow process, but they are now able to be in the same room without the big one whipping the young one's a**. The thing that seemed to work best with mine was to feed them in the same room..that way, they identify meal time with being around each other. They have tangled several times in the last 3 years, but it's gotten so much better. I have also tried to admonish the big cat when he starts his 'death stalk' toward the little one. Good luck. Sometimes they just do not get along with each other....like people, I guess.
I hope someone here can help me. I've had a girl and boy Siamese for 8 years. All of the sudden and out of the blue my girl is hissing at her brother and hasn't stopped in two days. What could have happened to her?
I have 4 Persian Himilayans. I started out with a white Persian himmei and then got a bluepoint male and decided to mate them. The mother had 4 kittens and all died except for one male so I kept the male. The mother then had 4 more kittens and I kept a blue female out of that litter and sold the rest. Now the father and son are not getting along, initially they were best buds but now the father constantly stalks the son and the mother being a mother beats the father for fighting/stalking the son. It's a real cat fight everyday in my house. Please help, any ideas?
Well, of the oldest females in my home, she does not play nor ever has played with the other two cats (brother and sister). Although on occasion I will catch them chasing one another down the hall. That's about it. But my small dog will do the same.
The brother and sister sleep and groom one another and of course Mr. C will be a pain to Neka as well and bug her until she hisses at him to leave her alone. I guess in time they will adjust. As Neka I have caught grooming Boomber (the oldest female) but Neka will groom my big dog also! She is a groomer, talkative, loveable cat. Boomer is a skittish female, and Mr. C well he is a man cat! LOL, it all takes time.. as all my cats are now 7 yrs old!
Hi All!!
do you see the picture included of three cats? well those are mine.. the orange tabby and the tortoise are brother and sister. boomer is the oldest of the three and she is the tiger on the end.. anyway.. i re-read all of the posts again, and have to agree.. try using the same brush on all your cats.. feed out of the 'same' plate (not bowl) use a large plate if you have to... their scent will be on the plate no matter what... also if they fight.. use a spray bottle..
its always hard on you, when there is a 'bully'.. but it is a dominant thing.. the 'alpha' attitudes going on.. LOL
you also might have to either live with what you have, if you cannot find any other solutions, or find another home where they can find some peace and happiness.. that is the hardest and last resort.. good luck!!!
I have a bully Siamese mix, my other cat brought her home. I've had her since she was 6 weeks old. (she is fixed he is not) She is horrible, she bites him hard enough to break skin pushes him out of his sleeping spots, and he just takes it and will snuggle up next to her and clean her ears. It got to to the point she wouldn't let him eat. I've always done the one bowl thing and the same brushes, too cheap to buy two of everything.
So I put her a cage in front of the food bowl and feed him the yummiest wet foodIi could find. I made sure I only gave him what he could eat in one setting. So she only got to lick the plate. I did this every day at the same time. At first she was even meaner to him, but she got sprayed with the water bottle and put in her cage. It took her about 3 months but she got the point that I wanted him to be top cat. As long as I keep on top of it and make sure she knows the pecking order, she does very well.
She is a lot calmer for it and he will stand up for himself. Now they just love each other.
We have 2 cats. a six yr old female who was here alone until 2 yrs ago. Then to the door arrived a little black female. The older lives in the house, except when on the patio. The younger lives in the garage and outside, coming in only at night or early AM, when miss nasty is out on the patio. Any time the older can get a chance she will chase or beat up on the younger. IS there any hope? I so would like them to both be able to stay in all the time. I would be happy if the older would just tolerate the younger. Any thought or help?
We have 4 cats, Buddy is the oldest male(3.5 yo), Dudu is the oldest female (3yo), Toby Joe is the baby boy (2.5yo), and Anni is the baby girl (2.5yo). The first three got along FANTASTIC with each other, however, when Anni came along, our oldest female Dudu would have nothing to do with her. They don't fight, but they will not play, sleep within 5 feet of each other, or groom the other. Which we found extremely odd because Dudu is the most lovable, sweetest cat, always wants to cuddle, and sleeps on either my husband's or my chest EVERY night.
If Anni comes along near Dudu, she will hiss at Anni, bat at her, and let her know she is not wanted around. After talking it over with professionals and reading up on the subject, we concluded that Dudu (the older, more established female in our home) considered herself top cat because of the sleeping situation. She slept right on/next to Mom and Dad, well when Anni came into the picture, she liked to sleep on Mom, too(still doesn't sleep on my husband, much to his frustration :o) ).
This is what ticked Dudu off. And still to this day, they've been living with each other for 2 years, Dudu won't give Anni the time of day. But, we were given the advice to give them their own sleeping areas outside of our master bedroom and to close our door and let neither of them sleep with us. Maybe, if your older cat sleeps with you, this could be tried?
Joanie, a 6 month old kitten, has been ours since she was 4 weeks old. She's constantly attacking and bullying our old sickly cat Sammy. We have to either supervise them if they are in a room together or separate them.
Joanie has lots of toys & gets lots of attention. We have 3 fountains and several food stations. She won't leave him alone. Any suggestions?I have 3 cats; the oldest is 5 yrs old. I took in 2 kittens now about 2 yrs old. The last two are brothers, my 5 year old only likes one of them. He tries to hit the other and hisses at him. I feel bad because he really wants to play with the other two, but the older cat scares him by hissing and hitting him. I don't know what to do or try to get them all to get along.
By betsymatt
I am fostering two little 12 week old kittens (both female). They are fixed and vetted. They both hiss and growl at my adult female only, but not the 3 males I have.
What can I do to help them out?
So I will have had Lyra for two years on June 2015 and since the house is empty because I work a lot and so does my husband and the kids are usually busy I thought it would be a good idea to get another kitty. We did get one in November and now it's almost January and the two don't get along at all.
It's so bad that Giselle (the new one) must be isolated in my room because every time she sees Lyra she full on attacks her or chases her into somewhere she can't get.
Lyra is a loner and doesn't like affection, but will be held for long periods of time and sleeps with me. She also gets along great with dogs quite instantly. Giselle loves affection, she follows anyone anywhere and rubs you until you pet her. They are complete opposites and they are both around the same age. Giselle is only a few months older but drastically bigger maybe even double Lyra's size.
Lyra never starts the fights, but will hold her ground and I just don't know what to do. I don't want to get rid of Giselle, but Lyra is scared out of her mind. I've done all that I've read, the litter box is in my room as well as the food which is always full. I've tried getting them accustom to each other's scent. The only problem is that Lyra has been sleeping in my room since she was 7 weeks old, but I have no other place to put her because when we first got her all she did was hiss so the kids don't want to house her in their room. Please help.
I've tried putting a bell on her so Lyra can hear it and I've tried putting a harness of Giselle so that if she goes after Lyra we can hold her back, but when we put it on she won't move anywhere or she will army crawl a very short distance and after a while jump very high in the air twisting and turning like a fish out of water. Whenever they fight Lyra pees a lot and it makes a huge mess. If this keeps up my only choice will be to give up Giselle.
By Ashley T
I moved to my brothers, where he had 2 female cats. One was fixed and the other not. The cat that was not fixed had 3 kittens. He kept them all. So one of them I kept as my own. The 3 kittens and the mama cat and the other were all together. We all ended up having to move. My kitten is now 7 months old. His name is Sable.
By CN from GA
I have three cats, a seven year old tabby mix, she is very very timid and not too friendly, even to some humans. And the other two are at least one year old; one is a black mix and the other a long hair butterscotch. Anyway, we got the two kittens to get along, but Tiger, the timid one is fighting, hissing, and growling. Our black cat attacked her at first and the other one was passive aggression towards her.
They started trying to be friends with Tiger, but Tiger stopped trying to be friendly.By Melody T. from Fiji
I have a 15 week old kitten (male) it took him awhile to like us as he was a stray, but I have had him for 5 days. In that time something had come up where I ended up fostering a 8 year old female cat named Cleo. She also has no eyes on both sides. It has been a few hours, but I'm not sure if they will ever get along. They are both hissing at each other and had one or two little scraps. Help.
By Keira
I have two cats in my house, an 8 month old kitten (not neutered yet, going next week) and a 2 year old cat (spayed). Recently I saved a pregnant cat, 4 years old, from a really bad situation. I brought her home and it seemed like they all got along and then out of nowhere the pregnant cat started humming at the others and they didn't like that too much and now I can't get them to get along.
The 2 year old cat decided she will only intervene if things start getting too heated between the other two, but the second the pregnant cat sees the kitten she instantly starts humming and then the kitten tests his luck by inching closer to her and starting to cry out.
Right now I have them separated by room, but I hate that I can't let my 2 cats roam around my bedroom like they are used to. I have tried the putting the new one in the crate and letting them sniff and see each other but to no avail. I don't want to give the pregnant cat to the humane society because she has a few weeks left before giving birth and they will spay her. Please help me out! I love all my furry little ones and couldn't bear to part with any of them. I am currently trying out the Feliway Diffuser and it only seems to be working on my 2 year old cat. Please please help!
By Amanda
Introducing a new cat into your home can be more complicated than you might think. Proper steps in the process generally result in a positive outcome. This is a page about solutions for when your resident cat is aggressive toward a new cat.
After a trip to the vet for surgery your cats may have to be reintroduced to each other. They have returned home carrying different smells and may also be off because of the procedure itself. This is a page about cats not getting along after being spayed.
ThriftyFun is one of the longest running frugal living communities on the Internet. These are archives of older discussions.
