How Do I Ask My Mum How to Shave?

I'm 13 and I have really hairy armpits and legs. Everybody else shaves, and I really really want to as well. I freaked out and started shaving without my mum knowing. So far it hasn't caused any problems, but I have to use my mum's razor, and I know she'll find out soon. I really want to ask her to let me shave, so I can learn properly and get my own stuff. But I'm really embarrassed and scared to talk to her about it. You see, I have a lot of anxiety and find it scary to ask my mum this. Should I just shave without her knowing? Or does anyone have tips on how to get her to ask me somehow? And there is no way that I'll be able to ask her.

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October 23, 20180 found this helpful

To me it seems like you might have a good relationship with your mother. You seem to consider talking to her about you're very private personal body hygene. That is great and already very mature.
When i was your age, i did not talk to my mother about that and it took me a few mistakes to regret.
I think if you feel comfortable talking about it with her, then do it. If you have doubts, then maybe it helps, talking about shaving with someone else first, maybe you have an aunt or a older cousin you like to talk to? Maybe after talking to them, they can help you to talk to your mom.
Last but not least, there are a lot of young women who start to accept their bodies also with their body hair. Because shaving is something you don't have to do. Check out www.instagram.com/.../ and give yourself time.

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October 23, 20180 found this helpful

Ask your mother if you can use a depilatory instead of a razor. She may say yes to that. My mother did.

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October 24, 20180 found this helpful

I am so sorry you are going through this. You are at a tough age!! I feel for you! Almost everyone I know (and I am OLD) has gone through this as a teen...and those who have kids, have been on the flip side. Neither side is fun.

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What I wish someone had told me is first of all, when you start shaving (or any type of hair removal process), it never ends. Never. At least not yet in my world.

That is pain....but I get it....society things it is not cool about women and body hair..and we all want to look and feel pretty!! I understand why my mom wanted me to wait...but that is now, many years later. Back then, NOT so much!

I wish someone had told me I was pretty no matter what....which you are...we are all beautiful because we are who we are!!! I hate that women in particular are so focused on following these society norms.

I also wish I would not have YELLED and screamed at my mom. That wasn't cool. The conversation should have been calm and clinical. Just the facts. Spoken softly and with respect.

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So for suggestions on how to approach things...You can tell your mom you were reading up on health issues and saw this web MD article. You can even share it with her if you feel it is helpful:

teens.webmd.com/.../shaving-tips-girls#1

Remember...you are beautiful just the way you are!! Talk to your mom!! Mom's were teenage girls once too...so even if she is tough to talk to, if you approach her with love and kindness and not yelling like I did, you can decide the best way for you to proceed with your grooming needs!

Prayers and all good wishes to you!

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October 24, 20180 found this helpful

I would take a moment and ask yourself, do you want to shave for you? Or because of what others think of you for not shaving yet (or wanting to fit in with others because they're shaving).

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Right now we live in a society where we follow trends and hypes, but it's our own rights to shave or not and can choose to embrace our body the way it is naturally, or to shave. You can watch on YouTube "Why I don't shave my armpits"

Next, if you want to shave for you - there are different methods of removing hair. Example: shaving, waxing, epilating, removal products, maybe in the future even lasering.

The different methods you may want to go over with your mom to see what bests suits you. It would be a better idea to have a talk with your mom and your feelings and thoughts. I am sure she'll appreciate you going to her and not behind her back. Plus, she may not be happy with you using her razor without her permission. We don't know what area she is using the razor for and then you used it on your arm pits, vice versa.

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